


Inevitable Grace

by ten9



Series: I Am My Beloved’s [11]
Category: Stargate SG-1
Genre: Explicit Sexual Content, F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-02-28
Updated: 2013-02-28
Packaged: 2017-12-03 22:39:06
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 21,121
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/703420
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ten9/pseuds/ten9
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>This story picks up where part 8 leaves off…</p>
            </blockquote>





	Inevitable Grace

**Author's Note:**

> This story was first published on Area 52 HKH 5/9/09.
> 
>  
> 
> (These characters are owned by their respective studios and producers; I make no profit from these stories, they are provided for personal use only and remain the copyright of the author. They may not be reproduced either in whole, in part or posted elsewhere without permission.)

**I Am My Beloved’s**

**Part 11**

**Inevitable Grace**

 

 

 

They stood on the roof beneath a brilliant blue sky while the sun brought slow warmth to the cool of late morning. _Colorado Blue,_ Janet thought, noting abstractedly how their position on the rooftop seemed to frame them all in the vivid color. _Like the blue of Sam’s eyes when we make love…_ Janet blinked the moisture from her eyes and breathed determinedly though her nose, _in and out_ , she silently commanded in an internal, singsong voice, _in… and out...._   Teal’c stood between her and her wife, the baby held securely in his arms while the minister read the blessing,

 

“We do not know the true origin of our children. We call them ours, but they belong to a greater mystery. At birth our children are, as are each of us, filled with possibilities, but it is not your job to limit these possibilities, they will discover on their own what is and is not possible. Your job is to help them stay open to the marvelous mysteries and adventures of life...”

 

The Unitarian minister was a friend of Daniel’s from college, he was slight of build but his words were carried on a deeply resonant voice. Janet stole another look at Teal’c; the broad, proud smile never left his face. He had planted his feet squarely on the floor, in a warrior’s stance, and Janet could detect a slight increase in tension as the minister stepped toward him to lay his hand on the head of the child held so gently in massive arms,

 

“The love of a family is life’s greatest blessing, so may you live your life surrounded by love and family, Catharine Jackson Doran…”

 

“Here, here.” Vala murmured in a quiet voice and Janet blinked, suddenly aware that everyone’s eyes including her own were brimming with unshed tears; everyone, except for Catharine, who slept blissfully throughout the entire ceremony.

 

Everyone chuckled softly with the exception of Teal’c, who handed the baby back to Daniel.  Janet stepped around to slip an arm around her wife and pressed herself close,

 

“Hey,” she whispered, looking up at her. Sam grinned down at her and dipped her head for a quick kiss, “tired?”

 

Sam shook her head, “No, I’m fine.”

 

Janet gave her a squeeze, her free hand straying briefly over Sam’s growing belly, “Good, cuz’ the cake Teal’c baked looks delicious.”

 

The group slowly left the rooftop where Daniel and Vala held barbeques and headed downstairs to the loft. Once inside Daniel handed the baby over to Vala and walked straight to the dining room table, rubbing his hands together in anticipation,

 

“I’d like to say this cake is too beautiful to eat, but the intense, chocolate aroma has been driving me crazy since Teal’c started baking at _o’dark-thirty_ this morning…” he smiled and while the others laughed, picked up the knife and began slicing the multilayer cake.

 

“Mmm,” Vala cooed, “I need milk for this, Vincent, would you?” she asked sweetly, handing Catharine to the minister, “Anyone else for milk or anything else? Sam?”

 

“Yeah, sure,” Sam snorted and sat at the table, “and I’d like a big piece, Daniel.” She smiled sweetly.

 

Daniel cut a hefty slice and grinned, “Well, you’re eating for two now, so…”

 

Janet pressed the backs of her fingers against Sam’s cheek, stroking it briefly before sitting next to her at the table.  In the beginning she teased her wife that she was indeed eating for two, but to remember she was eating for herself and a golf ball. But Sam’s appetite for food and sex rose significantly as soon as she became pregnant again, although Janet had to admit that only her wife’s belly seemed to be growing. _She’s burning off the extra calories with all the extra sex we’ve been having,_ she thought, and suppressed a yawn; eternally grateful that Teal’c had accepted Daniel and Vala’s invitation to spend the night at their place. Sam had wakened her before dawn for a session of vigorous lovemaking, _God,_ she sighed inwardly, _I can only imagine what would have happened if she woke up to the smell of this cake baking in our kitchen._

 

“What’s so funny?” Daniel asked and handed her the small dessert plate, his eyebrows arched high.

 

She only shrugged, “Nothing, you’re right, the smell of this cake is intoxicating, Teal’c, you have clearly created a masterpiece.”

 

Teal’c bowed formally, his hands clasped behind him, “It was my honor to do so since it is the responsibility of the godparent to provide the cake for an occasion such as this.”

 

Vala emerged from the kitchen with a large pitcher of milk in one hand and a stack of glasses in the other, “So true, Master Baker, Master Teal’c.” she put the milk and glasses on the table and planted her hands on her hips, “And you’ll be happy to know that I shall be giving each of you some extra slices of this fabulous concoction to take home. Especially you, Sam,” she turned to her, “I know you need to keep your strength up…”

 

_“Yeah,”_ Daniel handed her the next piece, “the only reason you’re getting any of this cake at all is because Teal’c had to bake a _second_ cake when Vala was… _overcome_ and unable to stop herself from devouring half of the first.”

 

“It was the bowls,” she explained defensively, “after I licked the bowls clean I couldn’t help myself…” she mumbled around the cake in her mouth, “it was just sitting there and I- _mmph… exquisite.”_ she fed herself another forkful, “ _and_ he’s agreed to bake us one more before he heads back to Chu… back home.” she caught herself and holding out her arms for Catharine, smiled at the minister, “let’s free up your hands so you can enjoy some as well.”

 

“Oh, you’re kidding me.” Daniel said as he handed the Jaffa a piece of cake.

 

Teal’c refused to look him in the eye, “Vala Mal Doran can be very persuasive.” He threw her a dark look but Vala only smiled brightly back at him.

 

Daniel shook his head as he sliced another piece, “You’re doomed, Teal’c, you know that… she’ll never let you leave now.”

 

“Well, it was only fair,” Vala argued, eliciting raised eyebrows from both the jaffa and her husband, “Both Sam and Janet have so much going on in their lives now… they’re too tired… it wouldn’t have been fair to ask them to bake cakes as well.”

 

“What the hell are you talking about?’ Daniel asked, confused.

 

“Well,” Vala reached for another piece of cake, “the godparent is supposed to bring a cake for the baby blessing…. Sam, Janet and Teal’c are the godparents; and that’s three cakes, isn’t it?” she arched her eyebrows expressively at him, “Isn’t that the tradition here?”

 

“Oh, my god…” Daniel rolled his eyes then shook his head at her emphatically, “ _no_ , Vala, you don’t just add up the number of godparents…”

 

Sam, Janet and the minister laughed, waking tiny Catharine and Vala put her fork down for a moment so she could rearrange her in her arms, “Well it’s about time you woke up, young lady, you’re missing your own party.” She smoothed down the dark hair while the baby stretched and yawned then said to no one in particular, “Did you know the name Catharine means ‘pure’?” she held the baby close and murmured against a plump cheek, “What a name means is always a _very_ important consideration when deciding what to name your child.”

 

The minister finally piped up, “That’s true…. Are you going to call her Cathy?”

 

“She’ll probably want us to when she starts school,” Daniel answered, “but it’s still Catharine for now.”

 

Vala gave him a sly, sideways look, “We could always call her _Jackie_.”

 

_“But we won’t.”_ he glared at her darkly, making everyone, with the exception of Teal’c, laugh again.

 

~

 

It was late afternoon when Sam and Janet returned home. Janet had barely dropped her purse and the wrapped slices of cake on the kitchen table when Sam grabbed her other hand and pulled her determinedly from the room,

 

“Sam…”

 

“Time for a nap...” Sam purred, a feral glint in her eye.

 

“Jesus, Sam,” Janet begged, “couldn’t we-mph…”

 

Sam stopped suddenly and planted her mouth on Janet’s; kissing her deeply and Janet felt herself go limp and sag against her.  They stood in the hallway like that for a very long minute until the kiss slowed and Sam’s lips caressed her more gently, becoming chaste before finally pulling away,

 

“Sorry,” she sighed and straightened, “I really did mean let’s lie down for a nap; we can always make love after.”

 

Janet grinned, still looking slightly dazed from the kiss, “Gee, that’s big of you… but if I’m feeling sleep deprived then you must be too.”

 

Sam pulled her down the hallway to their bedroom, albeit more gently this time, “No, I feel great… I swear, in fact,” she pulled Janet against her and swept the smaller woman into her arms, _“I feel fantastic.”_ she beamed down at her and turned to one side as she carried her wife through the doorway and into their bedroom.

 

_“Samantha!”_ Janet fairly shrieked at her, _“PUT ME DOWN THIS INSTANT!”_

 

“Why? What’s…”

 

_“Put me down!”_

 

Startled, Sam obeyed, returning her gently feet first back on the floor, “Janet I feel fi…”

 

_“Have you lost your mind?”_ she swatted at Sam’s shoulder, her sudden flare of temper making her miss completely. Eyes blazed white hot at her and Sam stammered,

 

“Really, Janet, I…”

 

Suddenly on the verge of tears, Janet was breathing hard and she covered her face with her hands, swaying briefly on her feet she staggered slightly on her way to their bed,

 

“Janet!” Sam grabbed for her as Janet sat heavily on the mattress.

 

“I’m sorry,” Janet moaned.  Her hands dropped from her eyes and she held one out to her wife, “that was an insane reaction and completely uncalled for, but Jesus, Sam…” Chastened, Sam quietly sat next to her on the bed, _“you are carrying our child,”_ she placed a hand on Sam’s belly, “and until she comes out of there you have got to be more careful, alright?”

 

Sam nodded, “Okay… I’m sorry.” she mumbled, looking down at the small hand she held in her own.

 

“Hey…” Janet pressed the backs of her fingers against the far side of Sam’s chin so she could look in her eyes, “it’s alright, sweetheart, you just really scared me for a minute… nothing happened, did it?”

 

Sam shrugged one-sided, “No, I meant it, I feel really good.”

 

“Okay,” Janet finally conceded the point, “but can we still take a nap first?”

 

~

 

Janet woke slowly; her eyes held resolutely closed, her nose wrinkling unconsciously at the soft, persistent sound. _Oh my god,_ she thought sleepily, _is that coming out of me?_ Of its own accord, a hand strayed to her mouth and fumbled over her lips. When she finally opened her eyes she found she was staring blearily at one of Sam’s nipples and the corners of her mouth quirked unconsciously.

 

When Sam became pregnant again Janet had gone into full blown nesting syndrome and bought ten new pillows for their bed.  _Wow_ , had been Sam’s first response before innocently asking her wife where they were supposed to sleep. Janet had only smiled and arranged the pillows and blankets into an elaborate nest and each night since, both women fell asleep in the warm refuge nestled in each other’s arms and each morning Janet woke with her nose buried between Sam’s warm, generous breasts and her hand on her wife’s growing belly.

 

As Janet’s awareness of her surrounding came into slow focus she realized the soft raspy noise was coming from both above and beneath her and she stifled a snicker when she finally recognized the sound; Sam was snoring softly.

 

She playfully debated whether she should wake her by suckling the very plump nipple obscuring her vision but decided getting more sleep was probably the better choice and snuggled against the soft skin. She tucked her nose between Sam’s breasts and nuzzled the pliant flesh with her lips, cheeks and nose.

 

In spite of her accelerated physical recovery on PerdaVoy, Sam was inconsolable at the loss of the baby and in spite of the intense therapy sessions with Diane, she privately lamented that perhaps Janet was better suited to carry their next child.

 

_“I can’t do this to you again,” she had sobbed quietly in their room, “The more I think about it… I want to have your baby; I want to feel her inside me… I want it so much….” her voice faded to a choked whisper, “But I don’t think I should…”_

_“Oh, sweetheart… no...” Janet’s eyes had brimmed, “no, my love…” she placed a kiss against quaking lips, “None of this was your fault…”_

_Sam shook her head, tears squeezing from her closed eyes, “But…I…”_

_“But nothing, sweetheart…” Janet gently held her face in cupped hands and whispered hoarsely, desperate for her wife to understand, “It wasn’t your fault, we can’t just give up, baby, we can’t… I can’t let you, not when I know how important it is for you to give me this child, Sam…. I love you too much to give up now.”_

 

Once Sam decided to try again both Janet and Dr. Dawbray made her wait three months before deciding she was truly well enough to carry a baby full term.  Janet was completely silent the second time she implanted the tiny droplet containing their embryo inside Sam’s womb.  The air in the room seemed dense, heavy with emotion and anticipation, the enormity of their desire to utterly love the other making the experience as intense as any other Janet had ever lived in her life.  Realizing there was no need for surgical gloves she took her time applying lubricant to her wife’s opening; watching, enrapt, as Sam’s folds and opening became engorged.  She sighed at the deep, wine color of the fluttering rigid folds and slick, inner walls. She dried her hands and after smoothly inserting the speculum, placed the pipette holding their embryo in the specialized gel just inside her opening. Silent, both women watched the monitor as Janet slid the lighted tip of the pipette inside Sam’s womb and gently placed the microscopic droplet on the uterine wall. A long moment passed while they stared at the image on the screen, then Janet withdrew and removed the speculum.

 

Wordless, she lifted her wife’s heels from the stirrups and carefully tucked the sheet around her form as she stepped around the exam table. Still silent, she cupped Sam’s face in her hands and Sam covered them with her own. They pressed close against one another; lips, nose, eyelashes and cheek touching those of the other; love from one passing into the other. Time and space fell away from them and all that existed was the moment, and in that moment all that existed was the other until the other and the self became one and all that was left was love. Love that blazed as blinding white light until a loud sob finally broke them from their reverie and the one became two once again,

 

_“I love it when we do that.” Sam hiccupped, tears spilling from her eyes._

_Janet sniffed loudly and swiped at her wet cheeks as even more tears streamed down her face; “Me too, sweetheart… me too…”_

 

When they returned to their room at the Voyan hospital they made love completely, sobbing aloud with their release; their seemingly endless, joined orgasm leaving both women utterly spent and they slept entwined and buried under the covers for nearly twelve hours, completely unaware that while they slept their physician, Dr. Dawbray, had security bypass the lock on their door so he could slip inside and check on them when they failed to emerge for dinner.

 

~

 

“J’net?”

 

Janet stirred, fuzzily emerging from the light sleep she had surrendered to.

 

“J’net?”

 

“Yes, sweetheart, I’m here.” Janet yawned, pulling herself from between Sam’s breasts, “You okay?” she mumbled.

 

“Yeah,” Sam sighed, her hands smoothing over her wife’s breasts, making Janet lay back on the pillows and hum softly, “I was dreaming about us… _and now I’m all wet.”_ she added, her voice becoming sultry.

 

Janet smiled and finally opened her eyes, “Oh really?’ she asked as her hands slid beneath the covers and between her wife’s legs, “Oh my, colonel, _honey…”_ she drawled when she sank her fingers into a molten pool, “Ah’ am gonna’ hafta’ to do somethin’ about that.”  She pushed the covers from Sam’s body as she crawled between her legs and deeply inhaled the heavy musky scent that greeted her when Sam obligingly spread them, “That must have been one helluva’ dream, my love.” she murmured thickly and froze at the abundance of creamy cum that had gathered within her wife’s folds _, “Oh my god…”_ she breathed, all pretense of the southern accent evaporating as her own desire flooded between her legs.  The folds were fully engorged, the high ridges colored a deep wine-red, _“Oh…”_ Janet moaned softly when her eyes beheld the clitoris, fully exposed and erect, reminding Janet of a time when Sam was exposed to an alien technology that temporarily made her clit grow more than five times its length.

 

A benevolent smile caressed Sam’s lips until Janet’s tongue touched between her folds and began to slowly lick away her cum.  She inhaled sharply, her breath transforming into a groan that slowly grew into a series of grunts, gasps and groans as Janet’s mouth and fingers worked between her legs.

 

Janet devoured the salty sweet nectar and struggled to keep her eyes open, her gaze deliriously focused on Sam’s opening, clit and folds, _“Oh my god, you are so beautiful.”_ she whispered, watching as even more creamy cum emerged, flooding Sam’s opening once again.  Janet blinked, a lucid thought taking solid form in her conscious mind and she suddenly sat up on the bed, pushing against Sam’s legs so they bent at the knees,

 

“Let’s try some perineal massage.” she mumbled to Sam’s entirely deaf ears.  Coating her fingers with the thick cum, she drew the first two fingers on both hands from straining clit through thick rigid folds, into Sam’s opening and over the perineum.  Careful not to let her fingers stray too close to her rectum, Janet repeated the process, her own center dripping and pounding with the sound of her wife’s increasing moans and cries.  Sam gripped the covers and pillows in wildly clutching hands, trying desperately not to thrash in the bed, trying desperately to prolong the mind-blowing sensations, trying desperately to delay the impending orgasm for one more second… then another...then another…

 

Fully aware that she was running out of time, Janet concentrated on deeply massaging Sam’s opening, her fingers rubbing and stroking, firmly caressing, encouraging the quaking, quivering walls to widen and open even further for her.

 

_“Janet… uhn… nugh… JANUGH….”_ Sam gasped for air and Janet hurriedly increased the pressure of her fingers, massaging ever more deeply as Sam neared climax.  She squeezed and tugged Sam’s clit, finally inserting three fingers that furiously rubbed the pebbled patch,

 

_“Come for me baby…”_ she husked, _“come as hard as you can.”_

 

Sam’s back arched high off the nest of pillows, her protruding abdomen creating a rounded peak and as she screamed her climax. Ejaculate exploded from her center in one long thick, steaming stream and Janet quickly clamped her mouth over the geyser, her eyes closing in ecstatic bliss.

 

Sam’s body bucked and trembled and writhed weakly for long minutes, her scream of release gradually fading to choked sobs and breathless cries and whimpers. Janet held on for as long as she could, the non-verbal, primitive part of her brain hungrily devouring every drop of Sam’s cum. She licked the sacred essence from her lips as she crawled through the tangle of pillows, blankets and sheets.  She lacked the strength to grip the headboard and straddle Sam’s face, and she fell limply against a stack of pillows and spread her legs,

 

_“Please eat me, sweetheart,”_ she begged, breathless, _“Oh god, eat me… please… please eat me…”_

 

Her words and the smell of Janet’s arousal pulled Sam from her prone position and she crawled between Janet’s legs blindly, her heightened sense of smell leading her mouth and tongue along a trail of drying cum on her wife’s thighs and up into glut of steaming wet.  A guttural sound issued from deep within her chest as she dove into the deluge, making Janet cry out as her hands gripped blond hair that had grown past Sam’s shoulders and pulled her firmly into the screaming folds and wildly undulating inner walls.  Minutes passed before she found the strength to roll Sam onto her back, straddling her and ground against her face, trying to force the thrusting tongue deep inside.

 

_Oh fuck my pussy! Fuck my cunt! FUCK ME HARDERHARDERHARDER… FUCKME FUCKME FUCKME!_ Janet’s mind screamed silently as she violently thrust and rocked her hips onto Sam’s mouth and tongue, unaware that she was coming, unaware that blisteringly hot ejaculate was squirting into her wife’s mouth with each jerk of her hips until she felt the very last jolt of cum explode from her, the sensation making a cry that was half sob half shout tear from her throat.  She fell limply onto the pillows, rolling onto her back and Sam followed, settling between her legs, hands gripping her buttocks as her mouth continued to feed on tortured flesh.

 

Janet’s body trembled and quaked in the long aftermath, panting aloud as the room continued to tilt and spin despite her closed eyes.  After half an hour had passed she lay completely limp, her body numb and unresponsive to any further stimulation as Sam feasted endlessly between her legs.

 

When she woke later Sam was still between her legs, sound asleep, her lips and nose on Janet’s open folds.  She groaned softly as she struggled stiffly from her spread eagle position and softly stroked Sam’s hair, trying to gently shift her head onto her thigh, “Sam? Wake up, sweetheart…” she pleaded and groaned again as she slid painfully from beneath her wife.

 

Janet slid down the sheet until she was next to Sam in the bed and pulled the covers back over them before leaning in to press her lips against Sam’s. The kiss was slow and thorough as both women hummed and licked their own dried essence from the other’s mouth and face.  Long minutes passed until Sam pulled her lips from Janet’s and dreamy contented blue gazed into deeply sated brown,

 

“Holy crap,” she mumbled, “that was _great._ ”

 

~

 

“It’s been months, Daniel…”

 

“I know… it only takes a second to check the location.”

 

“Yes my darling, but you check it obsessively each time we check in with another reality and if you think about it, that’s adding up to much more than ‘just a second.’”

 

Daniel refused to either respond or look up from the mirrors’ remote and stubbornly dialed the location their Cassie had been diverted to when a third, decidedly unstable Cassie from another reality jumped into theirs.  Vala fell silent and the two of them regarded the dark glass of the quantum mirror that brought Sam back to Janet.

 

Instead of nervously chewing a nail, Vala kept her arms calmly folded across her chest.  After a full minute passed she threw her husband a sideways glance which he caught and he sighed heavily,

 

“I have to try, Vala…” he shrugged and looked down to dial another location on the remote. She responded by laying a hand on his arm and giving it a soft, reassuring squeeze when the mirror suddenly flashed.

 

Vala pulled her hand away, thinking she had nudged Daniel into accidentally activating the remote, “Was that you?”

 

“No… I don’t think… no, I didn’t touch it…” Daniel quickly squinted down at the location dialed into the remote then back at the mirror which continued to brighten, “uh… hello?” Daniel called to the glass.

 

Blurry images appeared and began to take shape as the mirrors’ mysterious technology suddenly brought the figures into sharp focus. Speech left Daniel completely as he looked deeply into the eyes that regarded him through the glass, _She’s in pain…_ he thought distantly and stood dumbly, the remote held stiffly in his hand.

 

“Hello Sam,” Vala finally spoke up and took a half step forward, “Doctor Lee, and I believe its Doctor Rayne, isn’t it?” The Dr. Lee that stared at her open-mouthed seemed frozen in place so Vala focused her attention on the Sam that looked at her with what was clearly raw grief. “In case you don’t have a Daniel or Vala in your reality, I am Vala Mal Doran and this,” she reached for Daniel’s arm again and pulled him forward a half step, “is Doctor Daniel Jackson.  And according to the location we have dialed into our remote device,” still mute, Daniel lamely held up the remote, “you are from the reality our Cassie was sent to when your Cassie switched places with her?”

 

The trio in the mirror seemed statue-like and Daniel began to wonder if it had stopped working when Dr. Rayne finally spoke,

 

“Yes, we are from that reality,” she confirmed, “we know from your Cassie that this is the day when you contact allies from other…”

 

“Is Cassie alright?”

 

The Sam that stood next to Dr. Rayne looked leaner than the Sam Daniel and Vala knew.  Both had taken in the jagged scar on her neck and black sling and the harsh, raspy whisper while Dr. Rayne quickly clasped Sam’s free hand in both her own,

 

“I’m sorry,” Sam rasped to Diane then turned back to the mirror, “I need to know if your Cassie got back safely.”

 

“Yes,” Vala hurried to reassure her, “Our Cassie returned to us unharmed… and she was able to tell us about what happened in your reality and about…” Vala noticed the tears that brimmed in Sam’s eyes and how she leaned into Dr. Rayne’s hand when she briefly caressed her cheek and gave her shoulder a gentle squeeze, “about the people there…. Is your Cassie…” Vala hesitated, given what their experience with the other Cassie had been like, “did your Cassie return safely to you as well?”

 

“She’s dead.” Sam replied; the words and harsh rasp of her voice startling both Daniel and Vala.  “She…” Sam tried to continue but a sob broke from her and she clamped her lips together against the violent trembling that radiated from her soul.  Tears slid from her eyes and Diane shifted closer to her,

 

“Our Cassie killed Nirtti then committed suicide by shooting herself…” Diane’s voice faded at the small sound of distress that issued from Sam’s throat and she gave her hand another reassuring squeeze.

 

Daniel finally spoke, “Oh my god, Sam…” his eyes closed briefly against the image his mind conjured, “Oh my god, I’m so sorry.”

 

Their Sam could only nod as tears continued to spill down her face.

 

“Oh,” Vala whispered, “I am sorry… my deepest condolences.” she could feel her eyes brimming as well and took a deep breath, “Our Cassie told us Nirtti shot you, we are so relieved to see you are…” blinking, Vala stumbled over the word ‘alright’, clearly this Sam was far from alright; “that you survived that.”

 

“I did.” came the harsh whisper, and Sam squeezed Diane’s hand, “I survived.” she whispered again, looking briefly at the slightly taller woman next to her.

 

Vala noticed for the first time that both Sam and Dr. Rayne wore matching wedding bands, “Excellent.” her voice warmed, “You know we have been dialing your location on our remote for some time now…”

 

“Oh!” Their Dr. Lee seemed to suddenly recover the power of speech, “Well, I had uh, I had a little trouble getting the remote to work…” he held up the device, “some of these buttons and the part that actually dials had some dirt and junk jammed under it… and I was so afraid of breaking it…” he shrugged at the glass, “so uh, anyway... it took me a while to clean it…”

 

While Dr. Lee rambled on, holding the remote this way and that, Daniel noticed Sam looked as though she was wilting before his eyes, and he watched Diane tighten her grip on Sam’s arm and whisper something in her ear, to which Sam shook her head.  The strain of waiting to hear the news about Sam and Janet’s Cassie and relating what happened to their Cassie had clearly taken its toll on her and Daniel decided to end the session for now, unless there some other pressing matter,

 

“Well,” Daniel brightened a little, “Better late than never. If you haven’t tried to dial other locations yet I could give you the addresses of those realities we speak to on a regular basis and tell you the dangerous ones to avoid.”

 

“Oh…” Bill looked startled, as if that never occurred to him, “oh, wow, you know… that would be great…”

 

“Great,” Daniel smiled broadly, this Dr. Lee was really not that different from their own, “then how about we dial in again tomorrow, say at this same time?  And we’ll set a regular time to check in so you can get caught up,” he looked at Sam and Dr. Rayne, “alright?”

 

Both women nodded, “Thank you for not giving up on us.” Sam rasped earnestly.

 

“Never.” Daniel smiled, “Take care, Sam.”

 

“Yes,” Vala chimed in, “And to you as well, Doctor Lee… Doctor Rayne.”

 

Daniel and Vala watched, transfixed as the glass slowly darkened, watching as Diane pulled Sam close and wrapped her arms around her.

 

A long moment passed until Daniel finally said, “My god, Vala, their Sam looks so… so heartbroken.”

 

Vala slid her arms around his waist and placed a quick kiss on his cheek, “Her heart has been broken, Daniel, too many times from what Cassie’s told us.”

 

“I hope she has someone to love… there.”

 

Vala smiled conspiratorially at him, “I think she does.”

 

~

 

Janet was standing at the sink, rinsing out her tea mug and smiled at the feel of soft lips on the back of her neck, “Hey sleepyhead, finally out of bed?”  She turned in her wife’s arms and pulled her down for hungry wet kiss.

 

“Mmm-hmm…” Sam devoured her tongue in a full on assault, making Janet laugh and pull way,

 

“Hey, don’t worry, we can still have a quickie before we leave for wo…” her voice trailed away when she saw the tube of lubricant and folded towel with the telltale lump on the dining table, “but of course, you already thought of that… _unh….”_ her words ended in a moan and she smiled, her eyes closing at the feel of her wife’s insistent hand working beneath her skirt, between her legs, “Sa-Sam, I… I just put on this uniform….”

 

“You’ll only have to change your panties.” she husked in her ear, her fingers stroking inside instantly slick folds.

 

“Do I… have to ask what’s in the towel?” Janet panted as Sam backed her toward the table.

 

“No…” Sam panted back at her, planting her mouth on Janet’s once again as she deftly unbuttoned and unzipped the navy blue skirt, letting it fall to the kitchen floor.

 

_“Sammph..”_ Janet stepped out of the skirt, hoping she hadn’t stepped on it with her heels.

 

_“Don’t… want it to… wrinkle.”_ Sam gasped.  They continued kissing until they reached the table, both women fumbling with Sam’s belt and pants,

 

“I’ll get this.” Janet mumbled.

 

Sam pulled the Feeldoe from the towel and as she helped Janet pull her pants and underwear down she rasped, _“Turn around…”_

 

_“No… I like to watch you put it in…”_ Janet whispered thickly as she stepped out of her panties and kicked them towards her skirt.

 

Breathless, Sam grinned as she inserted the bulbous end of the dildo inside her depths, gripping and stroking the purple shaft that extended from her body, _“Hand me the lube…”_

 

But Janet turned around, “I don’t need lube, sweetheart, you make me so wet…” she bent over the table, arching her opening at Sam provocatively, _“take me… take me, Sam…”_

 

Sam’s eyes were half-lidded as she stepped forward, a low moan escaping her as she drank in the sight of her wife’s pert backside, glistening opening, slim shapely legs and dark heels.  She slid the cock in the slippery depths, feeling the soft moan beneath her hands.  She pumped slowly at first; shifting her position to maximize the contact her body made with Janet’s with each thrust.  She massaged tender flesh where she gripped slender hips, trying to remain as silent as possible so she could revel in the sounds of slick, slapping wetness and her wife’s low moans and cries.  She grunted softly; the sensation of the dildo simultaneously rocking inside them both made her head swim. She slid a hand beneath and searched for Janet’s clit, and when the tip of her middle finger found the small rigid organ and she furiously rubbed the small throbbing shaft.

 

Janet arched on the table, a cry tearing from her, _“OH, GOD, SAM!”_ she moaned aloud _, “Fuck me hard now… fuck me hard, baby… harder!”_

 

Sam’s grin turned feral and she pumped and thrust inside her wife for all she was worth.  Both women undulated against one another with wild abandon, Janet’s pleading cries to be fucked ever harder never ceasing while Sam pumped the purple phallus and rubbed Janet’s clit with increasing ferocity until Janet’s body arched again, completely rigid, a strangled cry tearing from her throat.

 

Sam suddenly hunched over Janet, her hips shaking as they continued to thrust and undulate. A sob broke from her as she climaxed, the hand still gripping her wife’s hip sliding around to hold her close while they came, their bodies jerking and shuddering in the long aftermath.

 

Minutes passed before Sam could pant breathlessly, “This beats cereal for breakfast every day of the week.”  Tiredly, she slowly pushed herself into a standing position and pulled the cock from her wife, smiling at Janet’s moan of loss as she pulled the bulbous end of the dildo from her own depths.  She brought the shaft to her lips and licked Janet’s cum from its length.  When Janet finally pushed herself from the table Sam quickly discarded the Feeldoe on the towel and turned Janet to face her, kneeling between her legs,

 

“Oh, Sam,” she begged, “we’re running out of time, sweetheart, we’re gonna’ be la- _ugh…”_ But Sam was already licking hungrily at the cum that ran between her legs.  She shifted her backside onto the table and draped a leg over Sam’s shoulder, whimpering as she beheld the scene below, _“hurry, sweetheart,”_ she rasped, a small pleading sound breaking from her when Sam spread her labia wide with her fingers, _“Oh, god,”_ she moaned, her hands gripping the table’s edge, _“Oh, god, baby… I’m gonna’ come in your mouth… oh god… ohhh…”_

 

Sam’s vision swam and she fed blindly; her lips tongue and mouth feasting wildly at Janet’s desperate words and cries and she growled into the engorged flesh when the core of her wife’s being exploded in her mouth. She sucked hard at the hot cum, making the dining table shift loudly on the kitchen floor.

 

When her body was finished squirting cum down her wife’s throat, Janet let go of the table and sank to her knees, straddling Sam’s bare thighs and collapsed limply against her, suddenly aware of the trickles of sweat that ran down her back and between her breasts,

 

_“Well…”_ she panted, breathless, “so much for just changing my panties...”

 

~

 

“Sam!”  Janet sounded surprised and checked her watch, it seemed like she had just given Sam her wellness exam a few minutes ago, “Are you feeling okay?”

 

Sam looked both worried and embarrassed, “I’m leaking.”

 

They were standing near her office door and Janet steered her quickly inside, “From where?” she asked, trying not to sound worried as she locked the door behind her.

 

Sam unbuttoned her overshirt and held it open, “From here.” she announced, revealing two wet spots where her t-shirt covered her nipples.

 

Janet felt so relieved she almost laughed aloud, “Oh, sweetheart,” she stepped in close and placed her hands on Sam’s hips, caressing them, “early lactation is normal, and you’re nearly seven months pregnant now so…”

 

“How can this be normal?” Sam practically hissed, “I haven’t had the baby yet.”

 

Janet ran her hands up and down Sam’s sides, sliding them around to her abdomen and tracing slow circles, “Easy… I’ll admit it doesn’t make sense to lactate before you have the baby but it does happen.” As she spoke she pushed Sam’s t-shirt up over her breasts and reached around to unhook her bra.

 

“So what am I supposed to do with it?”

 

“Well, “Janet sighed, lost for a moment as she drank in the sight of the large, clearly distended breasts. She gave one nipple a gentle squeeze, noting Sam’s sharp intake of breath, “most women just squirt it down the drain.” she murmured and licked the droplet of milk from her thumb.

 

“Really?” Sam’s voice turned thoughtful, “That sounds wasteful.”

 

“Yeah, well,” Janet felt Sam’s hands stroking her back and she stepped closer, “you’ll have to do something because you’ll just feel uncomfortable and they’ll just leak anyway.”

 

Sam pulled Janet close and husked into her hair, nuzzling her, “And what do you suggest I do, Doctor Fraiser?”

 

“You could always let me take care of you.” Janet gave her a wicked smile and pulled her by the hand towards the couch, “Why don’t y’all lie down fuh’ this?” she asked in a silky southern tone.

 

Sam’s eyebrows arched in surprise and she stripped off her shirts and bra as she walked to the couch in Janet’s office and lay on its length. Janet slid out of her ubiquitous labcoat and sat next to her, “They do look pretty full,” she remarked, sliding warm hands up Sam’s ribcage and softly squeezed both taut breasts, “does this feel okay?”

 

“Yeah,” Sam closed her eyes and stretched her arms over her head, “They feel tight…”

 

Janet rubbed her thumbs over the leaking nipples and murmured, “Let’s take care of that then.” and bending over the breast furthest from her, took the nipple in her mouth. She suckled softly, although she knew from personal experience that Sam didn’t suffer from painfully sensitive nipples and gradually sucked more firmly, tasting colostrum as she filled her mouth with the protein and vitamin rich breast milk.  Her eyes closed at the creamy texture and she hummed softly as she suckled, her hands massaging taut flesh.

 

The soft sigh that left Sam’s lips was audible and she lowered her hands, gently caressing Janet’s hair, her eyes fixed on Janet’s closed eyes and mouth.  It was an awesome sight to be sure, it hadn’t occurred to her that early lactation could be normal and she had been scared half to death as she walked hurriedly from her lab to the infirmary… _who could have guessed that was normal_ , she thought, amazed at the sensation of having her wife suckle milk from her breast.

 

Janet suckled until the milk stopped filling her mouth and sat back up, her hand still kneading the now softened flesh, “Better?” she asked, her eyes dark.

 

“Oh yes.” Sam breathed and stroked her wife’s cheek, “Just one more…” a small smile tugged at her lips as her hands gently guided Janet to her other breast and pressed her mouth on the other leaking nipple.  Janet suckled obligingly, unconsciously humming again, content as warm milk filled her mouth.

 

_I’m feeding her,_ Sam felt the room tilt slightly at the observation and she watched her wife suckle with half lidded eyes, the experience taking on a dreamlike quality while Janet drank from her. Sam squeezed her legs together, her center had become full with desire and she could feel it soaking through her underwear and the crotch of her BDU’s.  Her breath became shallow and she panted softly, still caressing the highlighted brunette hair.

 

When Janet finished she sat up again, “I love you, sweetheart,” she husked, her hand still massaging the breast.  Sam noted the widely dilated pupils and showed no surprise when Janet suddenly grasped her hand and pulled it beneath her skirt, “I’m so wet, baby,” she begged, “I’m sorry... could you… _nughhhh_ …”  Before she could finish Sam worked her hand into Janet’s panties and squeezed her mound.  Working quickly, her fingers stroked the engorged, soaking folds and slipped two fingers inside, firmly stroking her wife’s g-spot while her thumb rubbed the stiffened clit,

 

“Kiss me,” she commanded, and Janet obeyed, moaning into her mouth. Sam felt the room tilt again as her tongue lapped inside, plundering a mouth that tasted of her own breast milk and she grunted quietly. As if in response to the sweetness she found in Janet’s mouth, her fingers stroked and pumped even harder and she pulled her lips away long enough to mutter, _“Come in my hand,_ ” she whispered harshly, _“shoot your load in my hand…”_

 

Janet grunted in response and pushed Sam’s hand further into her folds and inside, her hips bucking convulsively when she suddenly collapsed on Sam’s chest. She grunted faintly against her neck while her body jerked and spasmed as the spurts of hot ejaculate filled her wife’s hand.

 

_“That’s it.”_ Sam cooed softly in her ear, fingers still pumping inside, _“Come as long as you want.”_ she breathed.

 

They stayed connected for a long moment before Janet pulled Sam’s fingers free, her face contorting briefly at the loss. She knew what Sam wanted and raised the hand to Sam’s lips so she could lap hungrily at the cum in her palm.  Watching her wife with limpid eyes, she drew the long elegant fingers that had been inside her in her mouth and suckled once again, her eyes closing at the combined taste of Sam’s breast milk and her own cum.

 

When they finally parted Sam looked at her with the softest expression,

 

“What?’ Janet murmured.

 

“Feel.” Sam took her hand and placed it over her belly, “It’s such an odd, fluttering sensation.” Sam whispered to her, “You’ll love it when it’s your turn.”

 

It wasn’t the first time she felt the baby move and Janet could only smile as Sam’s belly moved beneath her hand.

 

“There’s just one problem with this.” Sam sighed and Janet raised her eyebrows, “I got so wet you’ll need to get me some clean clothes from our quarters.” Bemused, Janet turned her head to regard the clothes Sam discarded on her office floor, “No,” Sam clarified, spreading her legs on the couch, “I mean clean pants and underwear…” and when Janet swiveled her head to the wet spot on her crotch she added, “I got so turned on I wet my pants.”

 

~

 

Sam’s breasts had not filled again with milk but Janet suckled anyway, loving the texture and feel of Sam’s nipple in her mouth.  Her eyes closed in bliss, Sam turned her deftly against the tiled wall of the shower stall, gently pulling Janet from her breast she tilted her chin upwards and grinned as she covered her wife’s lips with her own,

 

_“One more orgasm…”_ she mumbled into her mouth.

 

Janet chuckled, amused, “Yeah, and _then_ you’ll be done.” she teased her affectionately.

 

In truth, Sam’s increased appetite for sex had grown on Janet; she enjoyed every moment she had with Sam, intimate or otherwise, _but I’ll never get tired of the intimate ones,_ she snickered softly then abruptly moaned aloud as Sam’s strong fingers slid inside her, nearly lifting her from the floor. _“Ohh my godnughhhh…”_ she moaned and gasped, her center forcefully clenching and squeezing the inner muscles together in response.

 

Sam grinned ferally and searched out Janet’s clitoris with her tongue, avidly licking back the fleshy hood and sucking on the tiny rigid organ, stroking it with the tip of her tongue.

 

Janet clutched at wet blond hair and pulled Sam’s mouth deeper into her folds, _“Oh jesus… ohhhhnugh!”_ Janet shouted as she came, her hips convulsing and jerking as blinding white filled her vision, making the spray of the hot water and shower stall momentarily disappear.

 

Panting, she slid down the tiled wall, her knees straddling Sam’s strong thighs, “I want you inside me forever,” she breathed against Sam’s cheek.  Her wife responded by flexing the fingers within and stroking her clit with her thumb, _“Oh god, sweetheart,”_ she moaned, still rocking on the hand, _“forever…”_ she panted again and planted her lips over Sam’s.  They kissed for a long moment before Sam pulled away and smiled sweetly,

 

“Okay, but it’s gonna’ be really awkward trying to get our work done on base.”

 

“Shut up.” Janet mumbled against her mouth.

 

“We could always see how that would work by cleaning the house first… with me inside you….”

 

“Mmm, kiss me.”

 

Sam obliged her, still softly stroking her wife’s depths, “We can practice all the likely positions…”

 

Janet groaned, her hips still moving on Sam’s hand, _“Jesus, Sam, just kiss me….”_

 

“I am…” Sam smiled and slipped her tongue inside, stroking the length of Janet’s tongue in perfect cadence with her still thrusting fingers.

 

“Kiss me some more.”

 

Sam snorted, “Okay, but we still have to go to work, you know.”

 

_“Mmmph…”_ was Janet’s only response as she suckled hungrily on Sam’s tongue.

 

“I’ll drive,” Sam mumbled, “and you’ll have to bend over the passenger seat,” she purred, _“so I can still fuck you…”_ she rasped, her thrusting fingers stroking the g-spot, hard. Janet suddenly came with a cry, her hips undulating convulsively as she ejaculated hotly into Sam’s waiting hand. _“Ah…”_ Sam sighed, holding her close, _“that’s it…”_ she soothed as her fingers teased a long orgasm from her wife, _“that’s it….”_

 

~

 

Vala thought the woman in the mirror seemed calm and composed, although barely on both counts. Diane told them Sam had been called away during the night to command the _Artemis_ , the flagship of their Earth.  Nirtti’s army of Hok’tars had attacked the Alpha site and according to Diane, the provocational act appeared to serve a sole purpose; to lure Sam into a deadly fight. Diane believed the genetically altered army intended to exact revenge for Nirtti and Cassie’s death by killing Sam, so Sam successfully argued with Gen. O’Neill that the only safe way to engage them was to intercept them at the Alpha site and stage the battle as far from Earth as possible.

 

***

 

_“I’ll have to kill them all.” she had said quietly, making Diane’s blood run cold, “I think killing me is just the first item on their agenda, I think they want to put my head on a pike and use it to rally their troops into a full-scale attack on Earth.”_

_“But they have only two ships, they couldn’t possibly pose a threat to Earth.”_

_“The intel we’ve gotten about this army has been horrific; the cruelty they have inflicted on other worlds out there…” Sam’s voiced faded, unwilling to revisit the heinous acts recorded by offworld teams. Diane had begun to shake and she tightened her arm around the taller woman,_

_“But why…” she tried to sound outraged but her voice shook too hard and the tears that brimmed in her eyes spilled in a rush down her face._

_“They’re dangerous… they’re insane…. It’s the only way, baby,” Sam tried to comfort her, “it’s the only way.”_

_Diane had tried hard to put a brave face on when Sam left; she had refused to take the black sling with her, taking it off and handing it to Diane with a small smile. After shaking hands with the general, she placed the softest kiss against Diane’s lips before stepping back and touching the device in her ear, gave the command to beam her away;_

_“Artemis this is Carter, I’m ready.” she husked in a commanding tone then, still looking at Diane she whispered in a raw voice, “I love you.” as the bright light enveloped her._

_A loud sob escaped Diane’s lips and she clamped a hand over her mouth, her eyes slamming shut, making the tears gathered there spill down her cheeks.  She hurried to compose herself, sniffing and loudly clearing her throat while the heels of both hands pressed briefly against her brow. When she finally wiped away the makeup she was certain had smeared beneath her eyes she turned watery blue to Gen. O’Neill,_

_“And now we wait…” he sighed; jamming a hand in his pocket her held the other out to her and led her from the briefing room and into his office._

 

“And Doctor Lee is busy working on some sort of sensor array… so that’s why I am here alone today…” her Aussie accent sounded thick with emotion and she cleared her throat, an audible sigh escaping her as though she had been holding her breath. She blinked the moisture from her eyes, determined not to break down in front of the couple who watched her sympathetically in the mirror,

 

***

 

“Oh, Diane,” Vala briefly held a hand toward the mirror and Daniel felt himself tense; his hand surreptitiously reaching behind her to her belt, afraid she might accidentally touch the glass, “I am so sorry, it’s so hard being a military wife, isn’t it?  Constantly wondering if you’ve become a widow…” she watched as the woman in the glass tightly crossed her arms across her chest and nodded,

 

“Yes.” she managed and sniffed loudly.

 

“In all their years of marriage,” Daniel offered gently, “It’s never gotten any easier for Sam’s wife in this reality either...”

 

~

 

Vala heaved a sigh and stretched her arms over her head as she rose from the chair, “Are you alright?” she asked, looking down at Daniel.

 

“Yeah,” Daniel nodded, still feeling overwhelmed by all the information. He sighed and rose from his chair, carefully placing the mirror’s remote on his worktable, “Although I don’t know if I’d’ve been able to ask some of the questions I did if Sam had been there.”

 

Vala nodded, stepping close, “Horrifying…” she agreed, “Thank goodness their Sam has Diane in that reality.” she sighed and dropped her head on Daniel’s shoulder, “Nice of you to set up another time to check in with her next week.”

 

Daniel shrugged, “This way she has a couple of confidants she can talk to until Sam gets back….”

 

The other Sam’s recovery from the two gunshot wounds had been difficult, and Daniel had no doubt it was only the love of Diane Rayne and support of Gen. O’Neill that brought her back. And even though Diane was clearly going through hell having Sam away on a dangerous mission, Daniel was happy to know they had found each other in that reality.  He had no doubt Diane’s Sam would do everything in her power to bring her crew… and herself, safely back home.

 

“We may be chatting with her a lot before she comes back home….” Vala suppressed a shudder, “Perhaps we ought to check in more often… say twice a week?”

 

“Okay.”

 

“You know,” her brow furrowed and she pulled back to regard her husband, “I keep forgetting to ask if they have a Daniel Jackson and Vala Mal Doran in their reality.”

 

“Next time...” Daniel muttered.

 

“Mmm...” Vala nodded distractedly.

 

Daniel tightened his arms around her, “We should invite Sam and Janet over for dinner so we can fill them in.”

 

Vala’s brow furrowed briefly, “Doesn’t make for sparkling dinner conversation, my darling…” she murmured and looked down at her watch, “Let’s see if we can tell them in a conference room first and then invite them over for dinner after.”

 

“Yeah, okay,” Daniel nodded, “I think they should know before we debrief with General Hammond… let’s go get Sam.”

 

~

 

Vala shifted her weight from one foot to the other and planted her hands on her hips, _“Humph.”_ she looked around Sam’s empty lab, “where do you suppose she’s gone off…”

 

“Sam!” Daniel raced around Sam’s worktable, “Sam?”

 

Sam was lying on her side on the floor; her hands tucked beneath her cheek, Daniel sank to his knees at her side and shook her gently by the shoulder, “Sam?”

 

Vala knelt next to her husband and smoothed the long blond hair from her face, “Sam?” she called to her worriedly.

 

Sam sniffed and yawned deeply; “Yeah?” she asked sleepily and rolled onto her back, _“Ow…”_

 

“I’ll get Janet...”

 

Sam was suddenly awake, “ _No!_ Daniel, wait, I’m okay, really I’m… _crap!”_ She groaned as she struggled to sit up, “Oh shit, these rubber mats…” she rubbed her elbow and leaned tiredly against the wall, “cold in here…”

 

“What the hell…” Daniel took her hand and rubbed it, “Sam, you’re freezing, what happened?”

 

“Sleepy…” Sam mumbled then emitted another huge yawn.

 

_“You’re sleepy?”_ Daniel repeated, incredulous, “Sam, _you’re on the concrete floor of your lab._ ” He carefully enunciated each word as though he was speaking to a child.

 

“It’s a rubber mat, Daniel…” she mumbled, “I just sat down for a minute…” she finally took in their shocked expressions, “ _really_ , I just got tired and drifted off.”

 

Vala swiftly crossed the lab to Sam’s phone and dialed the infirmary, “This is Vala Mal Doran, I need Doctor Fraiser right away, please…”

 

“ _Wait!_ Vala…” Sam tried to struggle from her place on the floor but Daniel laid a hand on her arm, stopping her,

 

“It’s too late,” Daniel sighed, “you’re in trouble so you might as well just sit back and… you know, suck it up….”

 

~

 

“You are significantly anemic.”

 

Sam sighed and stared down at the feet she rubbed distractedly together under the covers.

 

Janet looked down at her crossed arms and quickly pulled them from across her chest. She told herself she wasn’t going to scold her wife, _and here I am doing exactly that_ , she scolded herself,

 

“It’s quite a drop in your red blood cells from the panel I ran just a week ago, sweetheart…” she took Sam’s hand and gave it a squeeze, “everything else is well within the normal range, you just have a lot less red blood cells now that you’re in the last trimester when the baby really starts to grow a great deal bigger… and your body is giving up a lot more energy to her development…”

 

Sam’s eyes brimmed, “Is the baby okay?” she whispered in a terrified voice.

 

“Yes,” Janet drew a deep breath and gave the hand she held a firm squeeze; “Sam… look at me…” she entreated, making desperate watery blue turn to her, “the baby is fine, but your body is giving up a lot more red blood cells for her development and that’s what’s making you so tired… you just need to get more rest now, that’s all, you just need to rest more.”

 

Sam nodded and looked at her doctor/wife, “Okay… am I confined to the infirmary?”

 

Janet gave her a small smile, “How about my office? You could get some work done in there, couldn’t you?  Then nap on the couch when you need to…” she almost wept at the look of relief that crossed Sam’s features, “You’re doing fine sweetheart,” she leaned on one elbow and placed a soft kiss against her cheek, “this happens to a lot of women… it’s not just you, okay?”

 

Sam sniffed and nodded, “Okay.”

 

“I still want you to spend the rest of the day here though,” she tucked the sheet around Sam’s form in the hospital bed, “so I can keep an eye on you.” she whispered and placed a soft kiss against her mouth.

 

“Yeah,” Sam finally graced her with a small smile, “I saw that one comin’…”

 

Janet’s smile broadened, “Is that a problem, Colonel?”

 

Sam shook her head, “Never…”

 

“Good,” Janet sighed and straightened, “There’s just one thing; I had us down for some grocery shopping on the way home tonight…”

 

“I’m fine, Janet, I swear, I was just really tired.”

 

“I know… I was just going to say why don’t we take the night off from everything and spend the night here on base, dinner should be passable. I’ll have it and some desserts sent to our quarters… whaddaya’ say?”

 

“You’re the only dessert I want,” Sam said earnestly, swiping at her eyes, “ever.”

 

Janet leaned close and whispered, “I am yours, Sam… always.”

 

~

 

Janet worried that there was too much light coming from the bathroom and debated whether she should get up and close the door to just a crack; cursing the small bulb in the nightlight that had blown out in the windowless quarters.  But Sam slept soundly and Janet loathed the idea of getting out of bed and disturbing her.  Absently, she swiped at her eyes; unsurprised to find them wet with unshed tears.  _Stupid nightmare_ , she cursed silently and sniffed. As seemed to be the modus operandi of her subconscious, the dream had started out pleasant enough; she and Sam were in bed, Janet softly stroking, rubbing and kissing her wife’s growing belly and suddenly the scene changed to Sam screaming in the delivery room while Janet and surgical staff scrambled to help her.  Janet shuddered and snuggled closer to her wife, _so much blood…_ she thought and closed her eyes against the horrific images. She determinedly opened them again and stroked the now long blond hair; _I love it when she lets me braid it in one long plait…_ and quickly pressed her lips tightly together against the sob that nearly broke from her. _Stop it now!_ she demanded somewhat shakily, _she’s fine, she’s anemic but she’s fine. She just needs to rest…._

 

Wearily, Janet’s eyes closed and she tucked herself close to Sam’s breasts, missing their pillow laden bed and wishing they had gone home and ordered dinner out, _but she just looked so tired, and I wasn’t feeling so hot myself,_ she lamented silently and inhaled deeply, reveling in the freshly scrubbed scent of military issue soap on Sam’s skin _.  I wish we could just grab Cassie and hang out with the whales and dolphins on PeredaVoy until the baby comes…_ Janet’s eyes opened again in the semi-dark room, _could we?  Could we just… oh for god’s sake, Cassie’s in school, she can’t just take off months at a time…_ Janet sagged a little in the bed, _and neither can we._ She thought, disheartened. She closed her eyes and snuggled against her wife’s soft breast,

 

_And this is the second time you’ve had a bad dream with Sam in the bed next to you…_

She sighed distractedly and rubbed her nose against Sam’s softened nipple in an attempt to force from her the image of the first nightmare the week before; of holding a limp and unresponsive Sam in her arms… the vacant staring eyes....  _God, that was a bad one_ ,

 

_I’ll say, looking down into pale sightless blue… you woke up in a sweat, crying…_

 

_Stop it!_ she ordered, sighing in exasperation.  In truth, Sam’s red blood cell count had been slowly dropping over the two previous panels.  Janet had hoped the drop was temporary but she hadn’t needed to see the lab results after Sam fell asleep on the floor of her lab to know where her red cell count was now; the suddenly serious anemia could be a sign of a problematic third trimester and Janet had felt her heart clutch in her chest when she looked at the results of Sam’s latest blood work.

 

Sam twitched slightly in the bed and Janet could hear soft, plaintive whimpers where she lay on her wife’s breast.  She lifted herself onto an elbow to peer at Sam’s face; her eyes were tightly closed, as if in pain and Janet hurried to stroke her cheek,

 

_“Shhh, sweetheart,”_ she whispered softly, _“it’s alright… it’s alright…”_ she slipped her hand beneath the covers and over her wife’s growing belly, feeling for contractions. But her soothing hand felt only soft, pliant flesh and she returned to stroking Sam’s face and hair, _“Shhh, sweetheart… you’re safe, I’m here… I’m right here.”_

 

The soft whimpers of fear and pain gradually faded and Sam finally seemed to relax in the bed. _Must have been a bad dream,_ she thought, and her fingers continued their soft caresses until she was satisfied Sam had drifted back into peaceful slumber before she returned to her place against her wife’s breast.

 

Vala had given birth to Catharine without too much difficulty, but despite their shared history of being hosts to Goa’uld; Vala did not have the same medical history as Sam, and given her wife’s equally unique physiology and medical history Janet privately worried that serious complications could arise despite Dr. Dawbray’s assurances that his technology could detect no reason why her wife couldn’t safely carry a healthy baby to full term, _Lots of women become anemic during pregnancy… it’s not that uncommon._ She kept her eyes firmly closed, determined to sleep, _If only we had better information about how her body would respond to more conventional…_ Janet slammed down hard on the thought. _Just relax… just breathe; in and out….  In… and out…_

 

_You know, you don’t have nightmares when Sam is in bed with you._

 

Janet’s lips pressed together in a thin line of annoyance, _Yeah, well I do now... so shut up already and go to sleep._ she argued, exhaling firmly through her nose.  She stayed like that for several minutes until the nagging voice returned,

 

_I think you need to admit why you’re having bad dreams._

 

Janet’s brow furrowed, _I’m having bad dreams because I’m … FUCK! Because I’m scared, alright?_ She rolled away from Sam, onto her back and stared at the ceiling, an audible sigh of frustration escaping her. _I’ve restricted her to light duty in either my office in the infirmary or my office at Academy… what more can I do?_ she sighed again,

 

_You need to call Dine and talk it out….  Sam could probably do with a session too._

 

She turned to look at her sleeping wife;

 

_She was doing just fine until you scared the shit out of her this afternoon…_

Janet rolled back against Sam’s breasts again and wearily closed her eyes for the umpteenth time. Her hand smoothed over the protruding belly and she felt her eyes brim behind closed lids, _I just need to remember to breathe,_ she reminded herself, _everything will be fine… everything will be okay... just breathe…._

 

~

 

“Haven’t dialed in yet?” Vala asked as she breezed into Daniel’s lab.

 

“No…” Daniel sighed, staring at his watch, “I have one more minute so I thought I’d wait

for it.”

 

“And their Doctor Lee didn’t say anything else about what was going on?”

 

“Nooo…” Daniel peered at her over the tops of his glasses, “I told you, he was in a hurry…”

 

“Fine…” Vala dragged a chair in front of the mirror, “but the suspense is _killing_ me.”

 

Daniel snorted and rolled his eyes as he placed another chair next to her and sat down, “Well, that’s what happens when you decide you have to pee in the middle of our mirror session.”

 

Vala folded her arms across her chest and crossed her legs, emitting only a disdainful, “Humph.”

 

Daniel gave her a teasing, affectionate grin and holding the remote towards the mirror, clicked it on.  They both sat back and waited, watching as the glass gradually brightened, revealing the Daniel and Vala of Sam’s old reality.

 

“Hello,” the other Vala greeted them, “how are you and how is Sam?”

 

Vala grinned back at her, “We are fine and Sam is spectacular; barefoot and pregnant in the parlour…”

 

“Kitchen…” Daniel corrected her, “It’s, ‘barefoot and pregnant in the _kitchen’_.”

 

“Don’t be silly,” Vala scoffed, “Sam doesn’t cook…”

 

Both Daniels exchanged looks in the mirror and the Daniel from Sam’s old world sighed, “I get a lot of that here, too.”

 

“And what is _that_ supposed to mean?” the other Vala pointedly inquired.

 

Daniel regarded his counterpart in the glass and pressed his lips together as the other Daniel’s eyes squinted briefly,

 

“Nothing… let’s just move on…”

 

_“Fine.”_   The other Vala crossed her arms across her chest and turned back to the mirror, “We were unable to speak with you yesterday because we are having an increasing problem with a race of beings called the Ori.”

 

~

 

“Please tell me you’re here for lunch.” Sam sighed as she rose from Janet’s office chair.

 

“Okay,” she smiled, automatically locking her office door behind her, “I’m here for lunch.”

 

“Thank god,” Sam groaned, unbuttoning the slate blue over-shirt as she walked to the couch and lay on its length.

 

“Ohhh,” Janet dropped the charts on her desk and slipped out of her labcoat, “you meant that literally.” she murmured sympathetically as Sam pulled open her shirt and unhooked the front-opening bra.

 

“Oh yeah,” Sam moaned, her voice tight, “They feel really full.”

 

_“Oh-whoa…”_ her voice faded at the sight of Sam’s shiny, distended breasts and she felt her center swell, becoming hot and thick with desire.  She sat next to her on the couch and bent to take the nipple closest to her in her mouth. She tried not to moan at the sensation of warm milk filling her mouth and drank quickly, eager to give Sam some relief and keep her mind on the task at hand.  After several minutes passed, Sam’s breast felt much softer and Janet could feel her sigh in relief. “Better?” she asked her voice low.

 

Sam looked down into pupils so widely dilated the brown had all but disappeared, “Uh huh.” was all she could manage, _“Please, Janet…”_ she begged, _“the other one.”_ As her hands urged her wife to her other breast.

 

Janet moved obediently to the other breast; her lips and tongue sucking and coaxing the milk from Sam’s straining nipple, her eyes closing in sublime rapture. While she fed her hand closed over the hand Sam held against her cheek and she pulled it insistently between her legs,

 

_“Please. baby…”_ she breathed against the milk softened nipple, _“oh please…”_ she murmured again before returning to her task.

 

Sam’s languid expression became decidedly amorous as her hand slid deftly beneath her wife’s navy blue skirt and squeezed her mound through her panties, hard.  Janet responded by clamping down on Sam’s breast, making both women’s bodies suddenly stiffen on the sofa.

 

_“Oh my god, you tease,”_ Janet breathed against the leaking nipple before sucking it back into her mouth.

 

Breathless, Sam slid her hand inside Janet’s underwear, her fingers sliding between hot, slick folds.  She pinched and rubbed Janet’s rock-hard clit with her thumb as her fingers made their way between the folds and into clutching, silken walls.  Janet responded by sucking all the harder, her hands squeezing and massaging Sam’s breasts.  Breathing hard, Sam watched her feeding frenzy and pumped her thrusting fingers even harder, her free hand on the back on Janet’s head, pushing her wildly feasting mouth even farther onto her breast.

 

Janet struggled not to scream her release and sucked Sam’s nipple as deeply into her mouth as it would go.  When she finally came her jerking body became rigid and she released the tortured nipple, endeavoring to grunt quietly while she climaxed, filling her wife’s hand with spurts of hot cum.  Both hands still holding Sam’s breasts, she lay boneless and panting on Sam’s chest.

 

Sam continued to watch her while she sucked the cum-coated fingers into her mouth, her free hand sliding from the back of her wife’s head to rub smoothing circles over the quivering muscles in her back.

 

“Best lunch I’ve ever had.’ Janet finally gasped, “But we still need food too.” She drew a deep breath and pushed herself into a sitting position, “So let me take care of you so we can get cleaned up, alright?” she inquired of deep indigo. _“I can smell you…”_ she whispered against her lips and pulled her from the couch, “Come here.” she commanded, and pulled her by the hand to her desk, “Sit here and lean back.” she mumbled, pushing Sam to sit on the edge of her desk while she hurriedly unbuttoned and unzipped her pants.  She yanked them down over her buttocks and whispered hoarsely, _“Time for some more perineal massage….”_

 

Sam’s head dropped back as Janet slid both hands between her legs, her fingers pulling her open and thoroughly massaging and stroking engorged folds.  Her fingers deeply stroked the slick flesh, rubbing the creamy cum into the throbbing opening, stretching and pulling, encouraging the quivering walls to open even further.  As the fingers on one hand ventured deeper inside the thumb and forefinger of the other squeezed and rolled Sam’s erect clit.  Janet pressed closer, and when the fingers within found the pebbled patch, her hands and fingers began to stroke and pump at a furious rate, making Sam whimpered softly,

 

_“Now kiss me…”_ she husked and Sam obeyed; her tongue and open mouth blindly searching for Janet’s. They slurped aloud as each mouth hotly devoured the other when Sam suddenly stopped,

 

_“Oh, Janugh!”_ she whispered, and came with a jolt in her wife’s hands.  With both hands still between her wife’s legs, Janet quickly knelt on the carpeted floor of her office and drank from Sam’s body once again.

 

Panting, her hands still gripping the edge of Janet’s desk, she looked down the length of her still jerking, convulsing bared breasts and belly to her wife who knelt between her legs in a pose of divinely ecstatic supplication,

 

_“Oh, my god,”_ she breathed softly, _“oh my god…”_ she repeated as tears filled her eyes and spilled down her face.

 

As the jerking convulsions gradually slowed in Sam’s body Janet slowed her hands and fingers, still avidly licking away every drop of sweet essence. She felt the soft touch of Sam’s shaking hands stroke and caress her hair when she finally pulled her fingers free and licked them clean as well.  From her knees she looked up into Sam’s tearstained face and smoothed her hands over her protruding belly,

 

_“I love you so much, sweetheart.”_ she sighed.

 

~

 

“Well,” Vala stretched her arms and legs straight out in front of her where she sat, groaning aloud before standing, “ _That_ was _a lot_ of information, wasn’t it?”

 

Daniel stood at his worktable; his glasses discarded to one side, head bent low over his journal, “Uh huh…”

 

Vala walked to the table and leaned with her elbows on the surface, waiting for him to finish writing his notes.

 

When he finished he straightened and rotated his neck and shoulders, “But,” he sighed, “worth it if these beings are creeping across our galaxy too.” He closed the journal, “Let’s see if General Hammond has some time for us…” he checked his watch.

 

“You call General Hammond,” Vala hurried toward the door, “I have to pee.”

 

~

 

Diane willed her eyebrow not to arch; both women were so well schooled in the art of minimalism, “So you’ve been having nightmares.”

 

Janet sighed, _no point in pussyfooting around_ , “Yes, but only a couple of times…” she noted from the corner of her eye how Sam tensed, “and I get _why_ I had them.” She added hastily, unwilling to reveal she woke from the terrifying dreams in tears.

 

“Which is?”

 

“It’s just a reaction to stress… and worry.  This is a new thing for us, and I can’t help but be a worrywart. I think we’re both more emotional, although I think Sam’s pregnancy hormones are probably responsible...” she gave a small smile, noting privately that most of Sam’s weeping occurred during orgasms, “Although I don’t have that excuse...” She reached for Sam’s hand and gave it a squeeze, “and bitchy, I’ve been bitchy too,”

 

Sam snorted with a lopsided grin, “And when was that?”

 

Janet sighed, “Remember when you picked me up and carried me t…” she stopped herself before adding, _to the bedroom_.

 

“To be fair, that probably wasn’t very smart on my part.” Sam conceded somewhat sheepishly, but her eyes showed concern for the revelation about the nightmares.

 

“Do you think,” Diane interjected, “the nightmares are your subconscious mind’s way of trying to find a way to purge the anxiety from your system while you sleep?”

 

Janet shrugged, “I guess so… it’s got to come out somewhere.” She sighed heavily, “I just wish it hadn’t…” she pressed her lips together in a thin line of annoyance.

 

“You’ve said before you don’t have nightmares when Sam is in the bed with you.”

 

Janet nodded, “I know, and that’s what’s so frustrating; to have the…” she struggled to find the words, “the _sanctity_ of that… _violated_ ….”

 

 “Well, you’ve still only had two nightmares since Sam has been pregnant?”

 

“Yep,” Janet nodded, “and since I get why I’m having them I’m not planning on having any more.”

 

“Good, but if you do?”

 

“I’m sure I’ll be coming back here some more.” Janet drily remarked, making Diane snort softly in amusement.

 

“And you,” Diane asked Sam, “sleeping well?”

 

“Yeah, I’m anemic so I’m tired, but otherwise I feel really good… good appetite, the whole nine yards.”

 

The corner of Diane’s mouth quirked ever so slightly, “Oh, really? You don’t look like you’re packing on the pounds.”

 

“Well,” Sam drew a deep breath, feeling Janet tense next to her, “uh… a large part of my appetite is really… just for Janet.”

 

Diane arched a single eyebrow high on her forehead, “Really?” she repeated drily, and laughed aloud when she saw Janet’s face color deeply, “Okay, I need to take a tea pee break…” she slid her long, elegant form from the chair and exited her office, “be right back.” she added, closing the door behind her.

 

“Sorry,” Sam mumbled.

 

Janet gave her a sideways look and snorted, shaking her head, “Jesus, Sam…”

 

Unable to make eye contact, Sam stared down at their joined hands and Janet jabbed at her playfully with her elbow, “Hey…” she chuckled and planted a wet kiss on Sam’s lips when she finally turned to her, “just don’t tell her we’re doing it three times a day, alright?” she pecked her lips again adding, “I wouldn’t want to make her envious…” she pecked her lips again,  “or depressed,” she pecked her lips again, “or bitter…” finally making her snort softly. Sam suddenly yawned and leaning away from her managed,

 

“Oh… _jeez_ , sorry.”

 

“It’s okay,” Janet grinned, “You know, given how tired you… and I are… maybe we could have sex just twice a day instead of three for awhile.”

 

“Okay,” Sam relented; heaving an exasperated sigh, making Janet smile, “As long as I can hold you the rest of the time.”

 

~

 

As she often did when preparing for an intense session with her patients, Diane watched her hands as she washed them in the stream of warm water; feeling the warmth of the water, the touch and feel of her fingers as they rubbed together and focused on the flow of energy in her hands; allowing the ritual to become an exercise, a meditation to prepare her for what she was certain was a breakthrough for the women who waited in her office.

 

Just the fact that Sam was willing to find a compromise within her role as Janet’s protector long enough to carry their child and Janet actually allowed the trusted Dr. Dawbray to play an important part in her wife’s care showed how far the couple had progressed in their relationship both within themselves and with one another. She turned off the water and reached for the paper towels, remembering her very first offworld mission; having been summoned by Gen. Hammond to aid the recovering, grief-stricken couple on a planet called PerdaVoy.  She would have been excited at the prospect on traveling god only knew how far across the galaxy had it not been for the horrific circumstances, although she still felt herself go weak in the knees as she walked up the ramp and into the event horizon.

 

She shook hands and spoke briefly with the couples’ pale-looking daughter, Cassie, and physician, Dr. Dawbray before having a private, impromptu session with Janet in her and Sam’s room while Sam slept peacefully in the doublewide hospital bed.  She quietly guided Janet though the events leading up to the Cassie from a third reality shooting Sam and the loss of their baby, holding the petite woman in her arms while she wept,

 

_“By the time we got her to the OR she’d lost too much blood…. There was so much blood… I couldn’t stop the miscarriage…” Janet had sobbed, “I couldn’t stop it…”_

 

Their physician, Dr. Dawbray, gave Janet something light so she could eat before Diane tucked her into the bed beside her still sleeping wife.  She spent the rest of the evening with their daughter and friends, Cassie, Daniel and Vala while Dr. Dawbray kept an ever vigilant eye on the couple. It was the next day when she finally got to talk to both Sam and Janet, taking them back to what she believed was a seminal moment for both women; when the third Cassie confronted Sam about her abandonment in the missile silo,

 

_“It was bad enough I left her down there…” Sam had been allowed to sit up in a specially designed chair loaded with unobtrusive diagnostic monitors, and she turned to look at her wife, “but I remember… when I integrated_ your _Sam’s experience of that… she didn’t leave…” she looked away, her hand clutching the blanket that covered her, her eyes brimming, “she didn’t leave…”_

_“No.” Janet had begged, pressing Sam’s hand against her heart, “No, sweetheart,_ you are _my Sam…_ you _didn’t leave.”_

_But Sam had refused to look at her as tears squeezed from her closed eyes, only looking out the window at the shimmering blue sea when she finally opened them again._

_Diane asked Cassie to switch with her counterpart from Sam’s old world so Sam could finally confront what she identified as one of the biggest failures of her life.  The two Cassie’s were well aware of what Sam had gone through with the Cassie that infiltrated Sam and Janet’s reality,_

_“It’s like she wanted to destroy Sam starting with her soul before finally killing her physically.” the Cassie from Sam’s old world had mused._

_When Diane led Sam and Cassie through their experience in the missile silo Cassie had been quick to reassure her,_

_“Don’t you think I kinda’ knew why you were supposed to leave me down there, Sam?  On some level I knew… I knew and I still loved you anyway…”_

_Sam surrendered to tears once again and Diane had held up a hand to Dr. Dawbray who suddenly appeared in the doorway, certain the sensors in Sam’s chair’s had alerted him._

_The young woman sat on the arm of the chair and held the woman close, “You make the hard choices for the right reasons, Sam…” she whispered in a voice thick with emotion, “I knew that. That’s why I still loved you… and I still do…  I still do….”_

 

After consulting with Dr. Dawbray and giving some privacy to the three women so they could rest from such an intense session, Diane waited until late afternoon before broaching the subject again.  Prompting Sam and Janet to discuss how it was before and after Sam came back with Cassie from the missile silo, Sam recounted the look on Janet’s face when she carried Cassie from the infirmary and the elevator doors closed,

 

_“I didn’t think I was coming back from that silo,” Sam confessed, “and when the doors closed and I couldn’t see your eyes anymore I felt my heart break…but I had to go… I had to….”_

 

_“I knew you were doing the right thing, sweetheart.” Janet had sniffed, looking deeply into her wife’s eyes, “I was so scared… I thought I’d lost you.  I thought I’d lost you both.”_

 

Diane then asked they tell her about Sam returning with Cassie,

 

_“When I saw her face I thought I’d never be able to look anywhere else…”_

_Janet had smiled, her lips and chin trembling, “I managed to keep myself together until we got into our quarters that night…”_

_They described what was unquestionably one of the longest days of their lives; how they had to decide how much to tell the young girl who would eventually become their daughter, how they fell apart and clung to each other when they were finally alone._

 

Diane gave herself the onceover in the mirror, and after checking her makeup she smoothed her hands over her hair and suit then walked back to her office. When Sam said the missile silo was, ‘ _one_ of the biggest failures’ of her life, Diane suspected there was another perceived failure that was holding her back, and she was anxious to see if this issue was about to surface.

 

~

 

“So I take it you are both doing well despite the anxieties that afflict all parents when they are expecting.”

 

“Yeah,” Sam nodded, “This really has been one of the best times in my life…” she looked at her wife somewhat wistfully.

 

“What?’ Janet asked.

 

“I just…” Sam shrugged, looking down at their still joined hands, “I just, I can’t help but wish dad was still here…” she blinked firmly, determined to hold her emotions in check, “he’d love being a grandfather again….”

 

“Who says he doesn’t know, sweetheart?” Janet murmured softly.

 

Sam only nodded, and Diane wondered whether she should press the issue when she continued on her own,

 

“You know I never got to say goodbye to him in this reality.” she said so quietly it sounded to Diane as though she was speaking to herself, “I got to say goodbye to him in my old reality, but here he died offworld… with the Tok’ra.” Sam finally raised her eyes to look at Diane.

 

“But you got to say goodbye to him in your old world?” Diane asked, unsure where this was going.

 

“Oh yeah,” Sam nodded, her gaze shifting out the office window, “But I was living a lie in that world,” her tone became harsh, “and while we should have been talking about good times and happy memories…”she shook her head, her eyes brimmed again and her voice suddenly broke, “all he wanted was for me to come out to him so he could tell me he still loved me anyway and all I could do was deny it all because I was scared and… and…”

 

“Sam…” Janet tried to stop her.

 

_“No,”_ Sam sniffed, “I was ‘out’ in this world and never got to say goodbye, but in my old world I was in the closet and got to say goodbye to him and I _fucked_ it up.” Tears slipped from her eyes despite the tone of self-disgust. “I was a big wimp in my old world,” she finally looked at Janet, “I couldn’t tell you I loved you right up until the day you were…” she looked away, shaking her head from side to side, her chin trembling, unable to continue.

 

_“Sam,”_ Janet’s voice became stern,” we talked about this…” she looked at Diane, “in Sam’s old world same sex relationships are forbidden in the military,” making the tall psychiatrist’s eyebrows arch high on her forehead, “and same sex marriage is against the law.”

 

Sam sniffed aloud, “I was such a disappointment to you both…”

 

_“You were not…”_ Janet squeezed her hand, “honey, please...  if I…”

 

But Sam could only shake her head from side to side, “I should have told him…” a sob escaped her, “I should have told _you….”_

 

“Sweetheart…”

 

Sam felt a rush of heat sweep over her as hot tears continued to stream down her cheeks, “But I didn’t have the balls… Janet, I’m sorry, if I had been stronger… smarter, then you wouldn’t be having nightmares...”

 

“That’s not true _, stop it now…”_

 

_“It is.”_ Sam’s voice shook and she clamped her trembling lips tightly together, sniffing loudly.

 

“ _No_ …” Janet placed her hand on Sam’s arm but she pulled it away,

 

“I’m gonna’ use the bathroom… for a minute….” she suddenly pushed herself from the chair and hurried to the door.

 

“Sam!” Janet followed after her but Diane continued to sit silently behind her desk. “Sweetheart, _please…”_ Janet gently clasped Sam’s upper arm, “it’s not your fault I’ve had a couple of nightmares…”

 

Sam’s vision blurred and she fumbled with the doorknob, _“Shit!”_ she muttered angrily and suddenly drew back her fist and punched the door hard, making Janet jump,

 

_“Sam!”_

 

Diane quickly rose from her seat and crossed the room.  Sam had punched a hole in the door and when she tried to pull it free it became clear her hand was stuck. A single, loud sob broke from her and she sagged against the stained wood,

 

_“I’m sorry.”_ she breathed, crying quietly and tried to jerk her hand free.

 

“It’s alright…” Janet soothed, holding Sam’s wrist still, “easy now.”

 

Diane clasped Sam’s shoulders in firm, gentle hands while Janet worked to free the hand from the door.

 

“I’m sorry.” Sam gasped again, still sobbing weakly.

 

“ _Shh_ , sweetheart,” Janet soothed as she worked Sam’s hand free, “it’s alri…”

 

Sam suddenly groaned in pain, her free hand reaching for her belly.

 

“Easy now,” Janet maintained a professional calm she didn’t feel as she and Diane helped her to the couch in Diane’s office, “just lie down for a minute…. Dine,” she held her hands over the bleeding cuts on Sam’s hand and fingers and turned awkwardly to the tall woman, “would you grab a towel or something…” Diane hurried to the gym bag she had stashed under her desk, “and I think we’d better call for a wheelchair,” she turned back to Sam, “so we can take you downstairs for some stitches and a couple of x-rays…”

 

Diane grabbed the phone on her desk and pawed through the bag while she waited for someone to pick up the phone in the ER. She asked for a team to come to her office and hurried back to the couple, her workout shorts and t-shirt in one hand and her medical bag in the other.

 

“Something’s wrong…” Sam grunted, curling onto her side.

 

Janet wrapped Sam’s hand in the t-shirt then wiped the blood from her hands on Diane’s shorts, “Sorry, Dine.” she apologized.

 

“Oh, please,” Diane scoffed gently while she took Sam’s vitals, “now I have an excuse not to workout tonight.”

 

Janet reached under Sam’s polo shirt and pulled down the elastic panel that had been sewn into her jeans to allow room for her growing belly. She smoothed her questing hands over her wife’s abdomen, feeling for contractions.   Their eyes locked as her hands stopped over spasming muscles,

 

“I think these are just Braxton Hicks,” she smiled down at her, “but we’ll check to make sure, alright?”

 

~

 

“Make them stop.” Sam begged her, “Give me something to make them stop.”

 

Janet carefully withdrew the needle from the back of Sam’s hand and put the now empty syringe back on the tray, “Sam, I can’t honey, I can only give you Lidocaine for these sutures…”

 

“Please…” Sam whispered in a strained voice.

 

“The contractions aren’t strong enough for me to stop them chemically, sweetheart… they’re probably false labor pains and the one way we can tell is to give it some time and see if they go away or get worse, alright?” Janet could feel desperate blue search the depths of her soul until Sam finally whispered,

 

“Alright.”

 

The x-rays had revealed a fractured fourth and fifth metacarpal and Janet had checked carefully for splinters and nerve damage.  She sutured the cuts on Sam’s fingers and hand and placed gauze pads over them before wrapping her hand in more gauze, “I need to get Gary to come in here and make a fiberglass splint for you… it’ll only cover the bottom of your hand to keep it still while the fractures heal, okay?”

 

“’Kay.”

 

“Hey…”

 

Sam looked at her,

 

“Give me a kiss.” Janet whispered and placed her lips briefly on her wife’s, “Even if you gave birth tonight you’d only be six weeks early…” she looked deeply into worried blue, “it’s gonna’ be okay.”

 

~

 

Janet had Sam moved to a private room with two beds and had just ordered dinner for two be sent to their room when there was a knock,

 

Diane opened the door and leaned in, “Can I come in?”

 

“Hey,” Janet smiled at her, “of course you can…”

 

“So… Braxton Hicks?”

 

“Yeah,” Janet nodded, “they stopped after an hour, but we’re spending the night here just to make sure.”

 

“Excellent,” Diane leaned on the end of Sam’s hospital bed, “and how are you feeling?” she asked Sam.

 

Sam nodded, “Okay.” she muttered, not looking at her.

 

Diane and Janet exchanged looks, “Okay, what?” Diane asked.

 

“I got frustrated _for one second_ and turned myself into her patient again.”  she mumbled angrily.

 

“You said earlier that Janet wouldn’t be having nightmares if you had been stronger somehow…. You’re already a pretty strong person, Sam.  Do you really think you could have escaped the Tian, that gang of thugs who tazed you and tortured you to death?  Do you really think you… or anyone else could have escaped that?” Sam was unresponsive and Dine continued, “I’ve read in your file that you once were captured and tortured by the Goa’uld… how many took you down?”

 

“I got cornered and they zatted me…”

 

“You got corned by how many Goa’uld?”

 

Sam pressed her lips together and it was Janet who answered,

 

“Colonel O’Neill said five in his report.”

 

“Five.” Diane repeated, “Would you think any less of Colonel O’Neill if he had been the one captured and tortured?”

 

Softly, “No.”

 

“Would you think any less of him if it took _only five_ Goa’uld to corner and ‘zat’ him?”

 

Sam shook her head no.

 

“Then why punish yourself?” She parked a hand on her hip and looked at Janet, who stood quietly next to the bed, her hand on Sam’s upper arm. “Firstly, has it occurred to either of you that even those of us leading the most mundane and ordinary of lives experience acute anxiety when our partners are pregnant?” Neither woman answered her so she continued, “You know; that two women are able to even have a biological child together on this planet is extraordinary enough… that you have very legitimate concerns because of Sam’s medical history and are having some scary dreams should only prove that this whole parenting thing is complicated so you should both cut yourself some slack.” She took a deep breath and walked to Sam’s other side and sat on the edge of the mattress, placing a gentle hand on Sam’s uninjured left, “I think pregnancy hormones are undoubtedly playing a role here in your experience of heightened emotions, but those feelings are triggering bigger issues you still need to deal with.” she gave the hand a squeeze,

 

“Sam, you need to get clear about who you are, or rather who you _think_ you are.  Explain the science to me… were you _you_ in your old world, _and_ in this one too? Or are you merely an imposter with no right to be here?”

 

“What?” Sam asked the question, but both women looked confused.

 

“You came through the quantum mirror and integrated the _first Sam’s_ memories, right?” Both women nodded, “At what point, do you think, did you become her?”

 

“I…” Sam stammered, “I’m not sure…”

 

Janet stroked her hair briefly, “After your first integration episode you said you remembered dying on the gateroom floor.”

 

“So that’s when you became the Sam of this world?” Diane asked.

 

“I don’t know…”

 

“That’s when you became her for me.” Janet said quietly.

 

Sam looked at her, wordless.

 

Diane continued, “But you kept the memories of your old world too,”

 

Sam nodded, “Yes.”

 

“And what are they like??

 

“I still remember them…” Sam said, still sounding uncertain, “but they mostly feel distant now… like a dream I had a long time ago.”

 

“And the memories of your life in this world feel…”

 

“Immediate… they feel…” Sam struggled to find the words, “real… like… they feel like they’re mine.”

 

“But are they yours?” Diane persisted.

 

“Well, yes…”

 

“Are you sure?”

 

_“Yes.”_

 

“Good, now you need to decide _who_ you are; you need to decide whether you’re the first Sam of this world, the Sam of your old world, _or both_. On PeredaVoy you kept referring to the first Sam’s actions in the missile silo compared to your own….  _You are not two separate people;_ you need to recognize that you are Sam Carter whether here in this reality or anywhere else. Once you came through the mirror and integrated the first Sam’s memories you became her because _you are her_ to begin with.” she jabbed at her with a forefinger for emphasis, “Here you make one choice and in other realities you may make the same or different choices, but you are still the one Sam Carter that makes them all.”

 

~

 

Janet awoke with a hum, realizing her hands rested on soft, long hair, “Oh baby that feels good.”

 

Her wife suckled softly on a hardened nipple and after a long moment released it, shifting her head back on one the many pillows on their bed.

 

“You okay?”

 

“Yeah, bad dream woke me up.”

 

Janet grabbed a pillow and elevated Sam’s bandaged broken hand between them, “How’s that?”

 

Sam nodded, “I’m okay.” she lied, the pain in her eyes betraying her.

 

“Wanna’ back rub?”

 

“No.”

 

“How about I nuke up the hot packs?”

 

Sam gave her a small smile, “You are my hot pack.”

 

Janet emitted an amused harrumphing noise, “Okay…” and placed a kiss on her forehead before lying back on the pillows, “how bad was this dream?”

 

“I remembered when you died in my old world….” she sighed, “So much of it seems so far away from me now, Janet. But there are some bad memories… and when I remember them… dream about them, it’s like they’re happening again…” Janet caught the waver in her voice and quickly placed her lips over Sam’s,

 

“Shh, sweetheart, easy now…”

 

“I dreamed…” she sniffed, her voice thick, “I _remembered_ …. I could hear Daniel screaming… screaming for a medic and I thought; Janet’s here, Daniel, you don’t need a medic…” her brimming eyes closed in the dark, “and suddenly I knew… I knew you were gone.”

 

Janet stroked her face, “Do you have that dream… that memory a lot?”

 

She swallowed past the lump in her throat, “Sometimes…. When I carried you back through the gate…” she dropped her good hand over her face and shook her head, “I carried you back through the gate…” she repeated, barely audible, “medics tried to take you from me… but I knew you were dead and I wouldn’t let go.” She drew a ragged breath and let the hand covering her eyes drop away, “I couldn’t let go and I screamed until they pulled you from me and General Hammond ordered two SF’s to escort me from the gateroom.” She sniffed and swiped at her nose and the tears that had slipped from the corners of her eyes.

 

“I’m sorry, sweetheart.” Janet placed soft kisses on Sam’s closed eyes and lips. She sighed heavily and reached a hand to check the pillow between Sam’s knees; “Does your back feel any better?” she asked, knowing Sam had begun to feel the muscles she had strained when she punched the door the day before,

 

“Yeah,” Sam lied again and cleared her throat, ‘are you sure I need to be totally bedridden?”

 

“Mmm hmm,” Janet smiled at her, “at least now I have you close.”

 

“But I’m your patient again when…”

 

“No, you’re not; you’re the woman I love, Sam. Taking care of you when you need it is what I want to do, don’t you get it? And I need you to stop blaming yourself for what happened in your old world… if I had been in your shoes do you think I would have acted any differently? All we can do is hope the people of your old world discover true respect for all of us who love, sweetheart.  You were my Sam before you integrated the memories of the first Sam of this world. You became my Sam because _you already were_ _my Sam to begin with_ ; every last atom of you is mine… and know that I am never going to let you go… ever.” She stopped for a moment and clasping Sam’s good hand pressed a kiss against the palm before pressing the back of it against her chest.

 

“When we sleep apart, I have bad dreams of losing you.  I always have, before I lost you and since.  Every time you’d go offworld I’d have terrible dreams of losing you in the OR, or offworld…. So when it is time to go, promise me we’ll go together…” her tone had been commanding and she lightened it, teasing her gently but her eyes still brimmed, “is that clear, colonel?”

 

“Janet,” Sam’s chin trembled, “you know that’s a promise I may not be able to keep.”

 

“I know,” Janet implored softly, “but promise me anyway.”

 

Sam sniffed and blinked, making two more tears slip from her eyes, “I promise.”

 

“Good,” Janet sniffed, blinking in the dark, “then we’re all set.”

 

“All I want,” Sam whispered, “is to be your wife, having your baby.”

 

“You _are_ my wife, Sam.” Janet grinned and kissed her lightly on the lips, “and you are definitely having my baby.”

 

~

 

“Hey Sam,” Daniel greeted her as he and Vala entered the infirmary, “lose your office privileges?”

 

“Oh, Sam…” Vala’s eyes grew wide at the sight of Sam’s bandaged hand elevated on a pillow on her belly, “what happened?”

 

“I got my hand stuck in a door and broke it.”

 

“The door?” Vala asked, horrified.

 

“I think she means your hand.” Daniel briefly rolled his eyes.

 

“Both, actually.” Sam shrugged.

 

“Oh my god,” Daniel hissed sympathetically through his teeth, “you slammed it in a door?”

 

“Not really, no.” Sam answered him.

 

“My god,” Vala rolled her eyes back at him, “you’re a bit thick today.”

 

“Oh, uh, okay…” Daniel’s brow furrowed in confusion.

 

“So you can’t hang out in Janet’s office anymore?” Vala plopped on the end of the hospital bed, tucking a leg beneath her.

 

Sam shook her head, “No…” she sighed, “I’m too anemic, and I pulled a lot of muscles in my back when I punched the door in Diane’s office so I actually don’t feel all that great.”

 

Daniel shoved his hands in his pockets, _“Ohhhh….”_ he exclaimed in sudden clarity.

 

“Oh, well,” Vala patted her on the leg, “shall I get us some popcorn and videos to watch?”

 

“Okay,” Sam brightened, “but I’m not allowed to watch any of the ‘Alien’ movies.” she said seriously, making Daniel’s mouth drop open in shock and Vala collapse in a fit of laughter on Sam’s bed.

 

~

 

“Whaddaya’ wanna’ doof for ga’ weekendf?” Sam mumbled around her toothbrush.

 

‘What?’ Janet asked from their bed.

 

Sam rinsed and spit in the sink and started rinsing her brush, “I said, what do you want to do this weekend?”

“Well,” Janet tossed the medical journal she had been reading on her nightstand, “I thought we could hike the north rim of the Grand Canyon…”

 

“Very funny,” Sam snorted as she clicked off the bathroom light and slid beneath the covers.

 

“Tired of watching videos?” Janet asked sympathetically.

 

“Yeah,” Sam sighed, “but I can’t think of anything else that would keep me _quietly_ confined to the couch.”

 

“I know, I’m sorry, sweetheart,” Janet snickered softly and scooted closer to her in the bed, “I’m sure one of us will think of something by morning.” Sam wore only the blue pajama bottoms, revealing her shiny and distended breasts, full with milk. Janet settled against her, taking a nipple in her mouth and began suckling.

 

Sam’s eyes closed in contentment, and after a few minutes she sighed in relief, “Oh, thank you… that feels better.”

 

Janet smiled and moved to her other breast, smiling against the flesh when she felt a hand softly stroke her hair. When she finished she pulled Sam’s head to her and kissed her deeply,

 

“Mmm, Sam…” she murmured achingly. She pushed the pajama bottoms down to Sam’s knees then scooted even closer until she could open her dripping center against Sam’s thigh, trapping it between her legs, “let me in baby…” she husked, her hand insistent between Sam’s legs, fingers sliding in slick rigid folds. Sam curled around her, a low moan escaping her as she helpfully lifted her leg to allow her wife more access, “Oh yes,” Janet groaned as she ground her open center against Sam’s thigh, slicking it. She inserted three fingers in Sam’s opening, making both women moan and pant aloud, “Oh my god… that’s it…” Janet panted, her thumb rubbing Sam’s clit while her fingers thrust wantonly inside her.

 

Sam slid her good hand between Janet’s legs and inside, mimicking her movements,

 

“Oh my god… oh my god…” Janet whimpered as her hips began to buck and grind on Sam’s hand, _“That’s it, my love… uhn uhn fuck me… fuck me…”_

 

Sam grunted softly and thrust until Janet came in her hand, the feel of her wife’s squirting hot cum triggered her own orgasm and she whimpered aloud as the waves shook her.

 

Both were winded for several minutes before Sam withdrew her fingers and licked the sweet nectar from her hand and fingers. Janet smiled and pulled her fingers free as well, lying back on the stack of pillows behind her she painted her nipples with Sam’s cum.  Sam smiled ferally at her and rolled onto her side, taking Janet’s still erect nipple into her mouth,

 

“I love falling asleep this way,” she mumbled against her breast.

 

Janet snickered in amusement, “Me too….”

 

~

 

“Janet?”  Sam tried not to sound alarmed as she made her way back to the bed, her good hand supporting her belly, “Janet?”

 

Janet struggled from a deep sleep and fumbled for the switch on the lamp, “Sam?” She scrubbed at her face, “What is it?” 

 

Sam sat gingerly on the bed, “I’m cramping and I keep feeling like I have to pee, but I’m not going that much.”

 

Janet helped her to lie back on the bed and immediately palpated her abdomen, “Did you pee a lot the first time?” she asked, keeping her voice calm.

 

“Yeah, but the feeling won’t go away, and I… _ugh!”_   Sam grunted aloud and curled onto her side, “Oh crap!” she groaned.

 

Janet got up and crossed to the bureau, pulling open a drawer and grabbing clean underwear, “I think your water’s broken…” she muttered and she hurried into her clothes.

 

“You’re kidding,” Sam said in a tight voice, and sighed audibly in relief as the contraction ended, “that’s what it’s like when your water breaks?  You feel like you have to pee?”

 

Janet snorted in amusement and shook her head as she disappeared in the bathroom, clicking on the light, “For some women, yes… I think it rarely happens like they depict it in the movies.”

 

“Huh.” Sam panted thoughtfully.

 

Janet emerged from the bathroom with a latex glove on one hand and a towel in the other, “I need to check you for dilation, sweetheart,” she said as she pulled Sam’s blue pajama bottoms back down to her knees, “Keep your knees bent, okay?”

 

“Okay,” Sam said somewhat vacantly, “am I having the baby now?”

 

Janet grabbed the tube of lubricant gel from the drawer in Sam’s nightstand and spread a generous amount on her gloved hand, “Maybe…” she answered noncommittally, and quickly inserted three fingers inside Sam’s vagina, “I’m gonna’ have to go as deep as I can, sweetheart.” she apologized. Her fingertips gently prodded her wife’s cervix, and she noted privately that Sam’s cervix felt quite soft as she gently inserted the tips of her fingers in the opening, “Uh… okay…” she pressed her lips together in concentration, “okay,” she repeated and looked at her, “you are definitely dilated to at least six centimeters…”

 

“Is that okay?” Sam asked worriedly, “I’m not at seven months yet.”

 

“I know.” Janet was quick to reassure her as she withdrew and stripped off the glove, “it’ll be okay, but we need to start timing your contractions now.” She kept her tone conversational as she wiped the excess lube from Sam’s opening with the hand towel.

 

Sam rested her bandaged hand on her belly and reached for Janet with her left, “So we could occupy our time by…” she let her knees drop apart as she spoke, “you know…”

 

“Jesus, Sam,” Janet sounded mildly exasperated and she kissed the hand before pushing it onto Sam’s belly next to her bandaged hand, “I am not performing cunnilingus on you while we wait for the next contraction.”

 

“Why not?” Sam asked silkily, “You said sex is good for inducing labor.”

 

“You’re already in labor, Sam.” Janet remarked as she slipped her watch onto her wrist.

 

“But it may be a long time before the next _contraaaa…”_ Sam groaned aloud and curled onto her side, _“Oh man…”_ she panted.

 

“Yah,” Janet sat next to her on the bed and began timing the contraction, “and here we go….”

 

~

 

“It’s alright to push this time, okay?” Janet gave the inside of her wife’s trembling thighs a reassuring squeeze.  Sam looked pale and was covered in a sheen of sweat; the nearly seven hours of hard labor had taken its toll on her and in spite of the presence of the midwife and pediatrician and well trained delivery room staff, Janet had begun to worry that her wife no longer had the reserves necessary for the final stage of delivering the baby.  She put down the handheld fetal monitor and sat back down on the stool positioned between Sam’s legs again.  The baby’s heart rate was only now approaching the high end of the normal range and Janet was desperate to move things along now that her wife’s cervix had dilated to the required ten centimeters, “That’s it,” she encouraged her as the contraction started anew, _“push, Sam… push!”_

 

Sam cried out, her legs shaking as she strained and pushed with the contraction until her entire body shook violently.  Her face turned red and tears squeezed from eyes held tightly shut in pain and concentration and Janet shook her head in frustration, _“That’s it,”_ she soothed, feeling the contraction end beneath her hands, “that was good… ease down now, Sam... _ease down…_ ”  She reached a freshly gloved hand back inside her wife and felt the baby’s head just crowning the cervix, _Oh my god, we have got to get this baby_ _out_ , she thought worriedly.

 

Sam collapsed back onto the elevated end of the delivery table and cried weakly, her breathing harsh, _“I can’t…”_ she gasped, _“Janugh…”_ she tried to reach a hand to her but was unable to let go of the bedrail she had been gripping.

 

“It’s alright, sweetheart,” Janet nodded to her encouragingly, “Just a few more pushes and we’ll have her out of there, alright?”

 

Sam lacked the strength to even shake her head from side to side, _“Can’t…”_ she gasped in a barely audible voice, _“take her out… take her ou-ugh!”_ her head flew back against the thin cushion and she cried out, if weakly, as the contraction hit her.

 

“That’s it,” Janet could feel sweat running down the inside of her scrub shirt and from her hairline into her eyes and a nurse wordlessly stepped forward to pat her face dry even as the midwife patted Sam’s face with an identical blue surgical towel, _“push Sam, push really hard now!”_

 

Sam’s injured right hand and fingers that had barely been able to grasp the bedrail suddenly gripped the chrome rail as tightly as the left, crushing the fiberglass splint, the additional pain making her scream.

 

“Oh my god, Sa…” Janet’s voice faded along with the contraction and her wife’s scream when the hand she held inside Sam’s vagina suddenly came into contact with the top of her daughter’s head, _“G-Good, sweetheart,”_ she smiled, if somewhat tremulously, “one more push, sweetheart, just one more, alright?” she drew a deep breath and looked to the nurse that clasped Sam’s broken hand and splint, “check for bleeding but leave it for now.” she instructed her, her hand checking the baby’s position inside the birth canal, “She’s about to crown…” she advised the midwife, who smoothed her hands over Sam’s stomach and nodded in agreement.

 

Sam’s face contorted and she cried out again as another contraction shook her and she forced herself to grip the bedrails in both hands once again, using the pain to make her push, her screams and cries making even the eyes of the delivery room staff brim.

 

Janet carefully eased her fingers around the baby’s head, her concentration total as she worked it free, “That’s good baby… just a little more...” she begged, and eased out a tiny shoulder. Sam cried weakly and grunted; her violently quaking body awash in sweat as she struggled to find the strength to keep pushing.

 

Janet pulled their daughter free, holding her securely in gloved hands, _“That’s it, Sam!”_ she cried out in relief as blood poured from her wife’s center.  She quickly laid the baby on Sam’s stomach and a nurse slapped two clamps in one hand and a pair of scissors in the other. She quickly clamped off the umbilical cord and after stealing a look at her wife, cut the cord.

 

“Excellent,” the patiently waiting pediatrician murmured, “”let’s give you your first exam, young lady…” he quickly scooped up the baby in a towel and hurried to the side of the room where he began gently suctioning clear the tiny nose and mouth.

 

“Sam?” Janet wiped Sam’s opening with a towel, checking to make sure the gush of blood had eased off, _“Sam?”_ she called to her worriedly.

 

Sam gave a low, guttural groan and her body trembled one final time as the placenta was ejected.  Janet caught the bloody mass in a pan and handed it off to a waiting nurse then pressed the towel firmly against her vagina once again, checking for further excessive bleeding.

 

Janet’s eyes darted from the abused opening to her wife’s face and she called to her again, _“Sam?”_   Sam’s breathing was shallow and she lay limp and unresponsive on the bed. Janet’s eyes darted to the monitor tracking her vitals, _“Shit! Her BP’s dropping, push fluids!”_ Sam lay motionless and Janet quickly called for more medications to be administered, _“Sam?”_   She stripped off her gloves and rushed to clasp Sam’s clammy face in her hands, “Sam, can you hear me?”

 

_“She okay?”_ she whispered faintly.

 

“Yes,” Janet willed her hands not to shake as she smoothed the sweat-soaked hair from her brow, “she’s fine, do you feel anything… strange?”

 

_“Chest hurts…”_ she breathed, her ghostly pale face framing unfocused blue eyes, _“unh…”_ she groaned softly as her eyes rolled up in their sockets.

 

Janet whirled on the staff, “Get me a lappy and a gasser… _now!”_ and turned back to her wife, “Sam?” Janet lowered the elevated end of the table so she lay flat then rubbed her knuckles on her sternum but Sam was unresponsive, “She’s out, get her to the OR.” she snapped at the attending staff and turning to the pediatrician, jabbed a forefinger at him, _“Take care of our baby.”_ she commanded and hurried after her wife, her heart pounding in her chest; Sam’s clammy face, chest pain and sudden drop in blood pressure indicated a likely rupture in her uterus and she ground her teeth together, determined not to scream in frustration.  Cases of uterine rupture in first births were rare, more commonly they occurred in scars from previous cesarean births and ruptures that happened prior to delivery nearly always resulted in the deaths of both the mother and the baby. A ruptured uterus bled quietly into the abdominal cavity, unnoticed until the delivering mother complained of unusual chest pain or experienced a sudden drop in blood pressure, _but she already delivered,_ Janet told herself firmly, _all I have to do is find the rupture and close it, she’ll be fine… she’ll be fine…._

 

~

 

She called for Sam’s blood type to be pulled from the fridge, knowing she needed immediate blood and fluid replacement. The anesthesiologist and laparoscope she had called for were already in the OR when they arrived and a distant part of her mind marveled at the efficiency of the staff as she called out for Sam’s vitals to be read to her while she hurriedly scrubbed her hands in the sink just outside the OR.  Her heart sank as the numbers were called out to her; Sam’s blood pressure and heart rate had dropped to a dangerous level; if she didn’t hurry Sam was going to code...

 

Janet worked feverishly to set up the lappy, her eyes glued to the screen she worked the tubular endoscope inside Sam’s abdominal cavity; carefully scrutinizing her uterus for tears, “Suction…” she said curtly, there was a lot of blood obscuring her view.  _So much blood…_ she tasted bile in the back of her throat and breathed steadily, determinedly, in through her nose and out through her mouth inside the surgical mask until finally…

 

_“Got it!”_ she hissed, spotting the bleeding tear on the left anterior wall of Sam’s uterus.  She hurried to open an incision over the site and sutured closed the tear, using the endoscope to check for more ruptures.  As soon as she allowed herself to breathe a sigh of relief her ears pricked at the sound of the alarm on the cardiac monitor,

 

“Um…” the anesthesiologist said worriedly, “I think…”

 

_“Goddamit, Sam!”_ Janet yelled at her, _“You promised!  You can’t code now!”_

 

~

 

Daniel and Vala waited quietly in one of the family rooms; Janet had one of her staff call General Hammond the night before to inform him neither she or Sam would be in to work the next day and why, and the general had called Daniel and Vala, knowing the couple would keep vigil at the hospital and keep him informed. Baby Catharine slept soundly in her carrier on the coffee table while Daniel slowly paced the room,

 

“Do sit down,” Vala pleaded from the couch she half sat, half lay on, “You’re making me more tired than I already am.”

 

Daniel ignored her, standing in the doorway and looking down the hall.

 

“Daniel?” she whispered, imploring.  When he finally turned to her she swung her legs to the floor and patted the couch cushion, “Now.”

 

He finally nodded and shuffled to the couch, sitting down heavily next to her, “Sorry.”

 

She slipped her arm around his, “It can’t be much longer…” her voice faded when a shadow filled the doorway, “Janet?”  They both shot to their feet and froze.  The petite woman wearily regarded them in rumpled, sweat-soaked pale green surgical scrubs, “Janet? Is…” Vala wet her lips, “Janet is everything… okay?” she asked somewhat lamely.

 

Daniel stepped forward and held Janet by the shoulders, “Janet, did Sam have the baby?”

 

Janet nodded mechanically, “Yes,” she answered in a flat monotone, “the baby’s fine.”

 

“And is Sam alright?” Vala stood next to Daniel and waited with a lump in her throat.

 

Janet sighed, looking at her with distant eyes, “It was close…” she slowly shook her head in wonderment, “I almost lost her…” her chin began to tremble and her eyes brimmed, _“it was close….”_ her voice broke and she sagged against Daniel’s chest, sobbing quietly.

 

~

 

Janet firmly patted the small back until she heard a satisfying burp issue from the small form she held against her chest, _now that one sounded just like her mama,_ she looked down at the small blond head and snickered softly. _The blond hair and blue eyes might change, but those lips are definitely mine._ She smiled as she followed her wife from their room, walking through the open glass doors and onto the deck that extended all the way down to the wading pools that connected to the open sea.

 

“Hey.” Sam greeted Daniel and Vala where they sat on chaise loungers beneath wide patio umbrellas.

 

“Hey, Sam,” Daniel turned in his seat to greet her, “Say hi, Sam, hi Janet,” he softly entreated his daughter, holding the baby against his chest one-handed so he could wave her tiny fist with the other.

 

All four barefoot adults wore thin comfortable bathrobes over one piece bathing suits and Janet handed the baby to Sam and sat down on a lounger then held out her hands for her wife to join her, settling her between her legs and pulling her back against her chest while the baby lay on Sam’s,

 

“Hey,” Janet greeted them in kind, “glad you could make it back here, how’s everything back at the ranch?”

 

“Well,” Daniel drew a deep breath, “General Hammond now has twelve teams making covert missions to the furthest reaches of the gate system to look for Ori incursion.” he shrugged, “So far, fortunately, they haven’t found any yet.”

 

Vala visibly shuddered from where she lay on the lounger and held out her hands for Catharine, “How awful,” she murmured and held Catharine close, “I am so grateful that business with the Ori and _their_ Vala’s evil daughter isn’t happening in _our_ reality.” She nuzzled a plump rosy cheek, “I’d hate to have to make some of the choices my counterpart’s making right now.”

 

Janet felt Sam tense in her arms and she turned slightly to look down into clouded blue and placed a knowing kiss on her brow.

 

Vala turned to Daniel, “What’s her daughter’s name again?”

 

“Adria.”

 

“Well,” Vala held Catharine so she stood with her tiny feet on Vala’s lap, “may we never hear of that name in our reality.”

 

“I’m all for that.” Daniel sounded as though he were only half listening as he looked out to sea, “I’ll never stop being amazed when I see that.” he commented, making them all follow his gaze.

 

A pod of beluga-like whales known to the Voyans as members of the Doke species were slowly making their way into the protected cove, one of them swimming with a Voyan researcher on his back. Like the belugas of earth, adult Dokes were white and their children were grayish, and the vertebrae in their necks were not fused together, allowing them flexibility to nod and turn their heads laterally. Their lips were quite flexible as well and the complex of muscles around their eyes made their faces quite expressive and Daniel found himself completely enamored with the species. The people of PeredaVoy had learned to communicate with the Doken hundreds of years before by at first mimicking their vibratory, birdlike twittering sounds until they could establish a simple vocabulary that grew into a full understanding of their language. Daniel envied them their connection with so many of the cetacean species on their planet, having studied how the respect the Voyan people had for all life had made things like pollution and global warming simply not exist.

 

He looked back at Sam and Janet, smiling at the looks of utter contentment on their faces. The couple and their new baby had been on PeredaVoy for nearly four weeks; after leaving the hospital Vala had insisted on contacting Dr. Dawbray and in turn Dr. Dawbray had insisted they transport the couple and the new baby to PeredaVoy so he could care for the exhausted family, which finally allowed Janet to relax and heal from her traumatic experience delivering her and Sam’s baby.  Both women looked rested and happy, and Daniel wondered if they longed to simply chuck it all and make a life here as much as he and Vala did,

 

“Are you ready?” he asked, a wide grin splitting his face.

 

“I guess,” Janet grinned back at him, “I still don’t get what it is we’re supposed to do.”

 

“Don’t worry.” he stood and pulled Vala to her feet.

 

“You are going to love this;” Vala beamed in anticipation, “according to Mee-el these whales love people, they love meeting them and they can communicate directly with human infants.”

 

“How do they do that?” Janet asked as she pushed Sam into a sitting position and swung her leg around to sit up as well.

 

“I don’t know but apparently,” Daniel helped both women to their feet, “they learned while swimming with babies.”

 

“Wow...” Sam replied and the four walked to the wading pools and per Daniel’s previous instruction, sat on the edge of the pool, their feet in the warm water.

 

The pod of whales approached slowly, and the Voyan man who sat astride the largest whale held up his hand in greeting, “Hello!” he called to them, “Hello to you from me and the LeoBovNee family!” He smoothly slid off the large male as they approached the side of the wading pool and sat on the sea-level wall that separated the edge of the pool from the sea, “I am Mee-el and these are my friends,” the young researcher wore close fitting swim trunks and had the long lean physique of a swimmer.  He introduced each of his fourteen whale friends by name, and Janet feared she would never be able to remember such unfamiliar syllables no matter how many times she heard them.

 

While he spoke the four couldn’t stop smiling as the whales regarded them and smiled back with their flexible lips, calling to them and their infants with soft cooing-like sounds.

 

Mee-el slid from the sea wall and crossed to Vala, “May I?” he asked, holding his arms out for Catharine,

 

“Of course,” Vala beamed, handing him the baby and stepped into the pool after him, “come on Sam, Janet… you must be formally introduced…”

 

Still smiling, Sam and Janet stepped into the water; Janet held a steadying hand on Sam’s arm as they slowly waded their way across the pool to the where the whales waited on the other side of the wall.  The pod began to hum; their soft chirruping noises making the water seemingly vibrate around them.

 

Sam chuckled aloud, “Oh that feels nice.” She nuzzled the baby she held in one arm and pulled Janet close with the other.

 

“The vibrational frequencies of their language have the ability to calm and heal as well as communicate.” Mee-el informed her; he held Catharine on his lap where he sat on the wall so the adults and children of the LeoBovNee family could greet her. “It’s alright,” he nodded at the couple, “Just sit on the wall and let them say hello.” he said while Catharine reached out her tiny hand to the nearest whale.

 

Janet held onto Sam’s arm until she got settled on the wall before joining her. They sat like Daniel and Vala, with their legs dangling on the sea side and the whales slowly approached, gently nudging the humans with their lips and malleable melons on the front of their heads.

 

Janet felt her chest swell with emotion when she looked into large gentle eyes and felt a sudden connection of spirit, _“Oh my,”_ she breathed smoothing her hands over glossy smooth whale skin that felt like a wet inner tube, “Hello…”

 

Mee-el beamed, “Excellent, please allow me to formally introduce you; LeoBovNee family, this is Samantha Carter, Janet Fraiser, and their daughter Eleanor Grace Carter-Fraiser.”

 

The water seemed to come alive again with the vibration of whale language; the entire family seemed to answer in a simultaneous greeting, making Catharine and Eleanor coo in delight.

 

“Yeah,” Daniel chuckled, “I knew the kids would be a hit.”

 

The whales moved slowly in the water, each family member approaching to greet the newcomers.  The water continued to vibrate with their calls and Catharine and Eleanor continued to coo and chortle in reply.

 

Sam nudged Janet with her elbow, “It sounds like they’re talking to each other.”

 

“They are.” Mee-el stroked and slung an arm around the nearest Doken whale, “They are talking about what feels good, warm milk, warm hands; all the things your babies like.” He stopped for a moment, seeming to listen to one of the Doken whales in particular, “I have been reminded that in order to properly welcome your newborn to her new life, it is important that they know what your daughter’s name means.”

 

“Oh, uh… okay.” Sam looked questioningly at the younger man, “Will they understand me?”

 

“Yes,” he assured her, “they understand our spoken language.”

 

“Okay, well, Gracie has been given my mother’s name, Eleanor, and where we come from Eleanor means ‘light’. And her middle name, which we’re now calling her by, is Grace… which is self-explanatory I suppose… but it’s a name that means a great deal to me…” she had turned to look at Janet and her voice trailed off as she got momentarily lost in luminescent brown eyes.

 

The whales had gone quiet in the water while she spoke and when she finished the thrumming began again, this time the vibration took on a musical quality, sounding symphonic to human ears.

 

“Gracie, you have been formally welcomed.” Mee-el smiled warmly and gave a slight bow.

 

“Thank you.” Sam held the baby and her wife close, “she was a long time in coming, but well worth the wait… and the effort it took to get her here.”

 

“Here, here…” Vala murmured in a quiet voice and Janet blinked, suddenly aware both her and Sam’s eyes were brimming with unshed tears and she leaned close, whispering quietly in Sam’s ear,

 

“I love you.”

 

One of the whales suddenly swam off as the entire pod began making loud, chirruping sounds, their open mouths framed by smiling lips and eyes.  The whale that swam off suddenly breached out of the water some distance away, arcing beautifully in the air before slapping down in the gentle waves.

 

Mee-el laughed, “They heard you.” he said, but his words were lost in the joyous calls of the pod.


End file.
